# Murphy's Law Theory

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THE THEORY OF PURRPETUAL MOTION

Question: if you buttered the back of a cat, which way down would it land?

Law 1: The Laws of Butterology demand that the butter must hit the ground.

Law 2: The equally strict Laws of Feline Aerodynamics demand that the cat cannot smash its furry back - it must land on its feet.

If the combined constructed of cat + butter were to land, nature would have no way to resolve this paradox (or purradox). Therefore it cannot fall.

When a cat is dropped, it always lands on its feet, and when toast is dropped, it always lands buttered side down. Therefore, if a slice of toast is strapped to a cat's back, buttered side up, and the animal is then dropped, the two opposing forces will cause it to hover, spinning inches above the ground. If
Murphy's Laws are also known as Sod's Law or the Law of Perversity/Cussedness. In its simplest form, it states:

"Anything which can go wrong will go wrong"

Here are some of the more likely outcomes of the application of Murphy's Law into Butterology/Feline Aerodynamics in an experiment involving a "cat + buttered bread" scenario. We leave the Application of Murphy's Law to "cat + tikka masala sauce" scenarios as a theoretical exercise for the reader.

As soon as you release said feline from a suitably high place, the strap used to tie the bread to the back of the cat will break, thus nullifying the bond between the bread and the feline. You may attempt to defy this by applying the butter directly to the cat's fur, in which case the cat will lick off part of your carefully calculated quantity of butter (i.e. that amount which holds the cat-butter assemblage in equilibrium)

In either case, a very cross cat will land on its feet, claws extended, upon a lawyer's brand new soft-top car - scratching the top to shreds if it is raised or depositing copious amounts of fear-induced feline excrement on the driver's seat if the top is