The Loss Of Innocence In Rudolpho Anaya's Bless Me Ultima

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The loss of innocence is inevitable, as humans grow up and experience life, influences are introduced and trust is lost. In Rudolpho Anaya’s Bless me Ultima, the main character, Antonio, is forced to grow up too quickly losing his innocence through a series of terrible circumstances. Antonio concerns himself with the loss of his innocence because of his own precociousness and his thoughts of a promising future as a priest. Furthermore, his mother is constantly worried that he is growing up too fast, losing his innocence, and she laments this concern often.. Throughout the book as Antonio faces hardships and losses, his wide eyed naive perception of the world dramatically changes.
The situations in which Antonio is placed, create his new perspective
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Discovering Andrew’s presence at Rosie’s while following Narciso startles Antonio, especially because Andrew promised Antonio he would not go until Antonio lost all of his innocence. “Andrew had said that he would not enter the house of the naked women until I had lost my innocence” (165). This changes Antonio because it makes him believe he has already lost his innocence. And that he has sinned against God, for the only reason Antonio can imagine for his brother to enter Rosie’s is if Antonio has lost his innocence. “Had I already lost my innocence? How? I had seen Lupito murdered… I had seen Ultima’s cure… I had seen the men come to hang her… I had seen the awful fight just now… I had seen and reveled in the beauty of the golden carp” …show more content…
I felt the tears running now, flooding my eyes and blinding me, flowing into the corners of my mouth, and I felt great sobs choking at my throat, trying to get loose.
“Thank you, father, I will sin no more--”” (170). Antonio hears the confession and Narciso takes his final breath, and instantaneously begins repenting and praying. His prayer could be interpreted as praying for forgiveness for hearing Narciso’s confession.
“I prayed, “Oh my God, I am sorry for all of my sins, not because I dread the fires of Hell, but because they displease you, Lord, Who art all good, and deserving of all my love and with Thy help, I will sin no more-”” (170).
With the death of Lupito and Narciso, and the other situations that arise, Antonio begins to question his faith, and his God. He begins to become open to the possibility of other God’s taking the place of The Catholic God. He recognizes other religions, such as his friends, Cico’s religion, The Golden Carp. And the natural religion Ultima participates in. This changes his whole personality because his personality was, at the beginning of the book,

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