The On The Minds Of Angry And Controlling Men Essay

1010 Words May 5th, 2016 5 Pages
Author and former co-director of Emerge (the first program specifically created for abusive men in the United States), Lundy Bancroft He has worked largely with abusive men for the past two decades and has often been an expert witness in the legal system centered around abuse cases. In Why Does He Do That?: Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men, Bancroft maps out the early foreshadowing of an abusive male, the ten abusive personality types, addiction’s role in abuse; what can and cannot be changed in abusive men; and how to exit an abusive relationship in a safe manner.
The first myth Bancroft dissects is that the abusive person’s partner has some sort of accountability for the abuse; this person is an enabler. Bancroft explains that an abuser can avoid confronting their actual problem by shifting some or all of the blame on their partner. “But abuse is not the product of bad relationship dynamics, and you cannot make things better by changing your own behavior or by attempting to manage your partner better. Abuse is a problem that lies entirely within the abuser” (p 19). Bancroft is able to disprove the theory that abusive is the fault of both parties many times throughout the book.
Bancroft invalidates the common excuses for abuse. There is a long list of excuses for abuse, some of these reasons are he was abused as a child, his past partner hurt him, he hates women, or he has poor communication skills. Bancroft does not debate whether or not these circumstances…

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