Why We Lie To Ourselves Analysis

Decent Essays
Terrence Manley
30 October 2017
ENGL 104
Synthesis Essay
Why We Lie To Ourselves
There are many different reasons why people lie. We lie to our friends, family, we even lie to ourselves. Believe it or not, we lie to ourselves more than you may think. We lie to ourselves either through willful ignorance or self-deception. Willful ignorance is the will to be ignorant to hurtful information or any type of information that will make us feel some type of way. Self-deception is allowing oneself to believe a false idea or believe false feelings. We lie to ourselves through relationships, we lie to ourselves to protect our own feelings, and we lie to ourselves to protect the feelings of others.
Self-deception is common among most people and is easy
…show more content…
According to “Why We Lie” by Alex Lickermann, we lie to ourselves to protect our own feelings. In the article, Lickermann states, “We lie to protect ourselves, lying often to avoid suffering painful consequences, shame, embarrassment or conflict” (1). Lickermann’s statement connects to Straker’s foundation of why we lie to ourselves. Straker states that, “Lying often starts with wrong-doing, in consequence, we deny the crime, deny the action or justify the act with some fabricated excuse” (1). To justify the connection between Straker’s and Lickermann’s statement, for example, if we were to do a terrible job at work and someone was to ask who did the job, we may lie and deny doing the job to avoid embarrassment or humiliation. In a case like this, self-lying can be a good thing to protect our self-esteem, ego and confidence. People make mistakes and sometimes deny a job that they did to avoid humiliation and shame and use it to motivate themselves to do a better job next time around. An example like this is classified as self-lying because the individual who performed the duty must lie to themselves and disbelieve the job that they did to be able to convince their boss or supervisor that they didn’t do the job. To convince others of a lie, one must play their part, convince themselves of their own lie, and then convince others of the …show more content…
Referencing to “Why We Lie to Ourselves” by Holly Brown, she states that, “We don’t want to accept certain things about other people in our lives… We internalize a concept of ourselves as bad rather than the people we love as bad. This sometimes persists in later life” (Brown). This statement connects with Lickermann’s statement that says, “We assume people are fragile and have egos that will likely collapse or at the very least be injured” (1). Brown also states that, “Denying the truth about others makes it harder to see the truth about yourself” (Brown). These two authors connect and support each other because the statements that they make support the fact that we’ll put other’s feelings before our own feelings. In Straker’s article he covers a section on childhood lying that will strengthen the upcoming example. Kids are easily influenced, yet very smart. If two parents were to get divorced, for whatever reason, the kids would rather believe that they are the reason for the breakup rather than to think that dad is a bad person. They will develop and encode in their heads that they made a mistake rather than wanting to tell dad that he made so and so mistakes and end up hurting his feelings. For a kid, believing that dad is a bad person is unbelievable and could hurt the kid’s feelings. So, we learn to lie to protect ourselves and others as young

Related Documents

  • Decent Essays

    Why Do People Lie Essay

    • 1453 Words
    • 6 Pages

    For example, if there is a person who does not like conflict, he or she may tell a lie to fix the problem (Ford 98-99). People will also lie to other people by leaving out less desirable information that might hurt the other person emotionally. Lisa Firestone wrote “Even lies told in the name of protecting others can leave you feeling pretty bad about yourself, because you don’t feel like an authentic, strong individual when you aren’t being honest” (Firestone). The most common reason that lies by omission are told is to prevent unpleasant situations from occurring, even if it causes one to feel guilty (Firestone). People who have a big heart or cannot stand the thought of hurting someone or embarrassing them typically will lie to the other person by leaving out the more displeasing details.…

    • 1453 Words
    • 6 Pages
    Decent Essays
  • Decent Essays

    Deflecting is a method of lying that some people use to shift the focus of a lie off of them and onto someone else. Omission is purposely leaving out details in a lie that might get you into trouble. Stereotypes and clichés are considered a form of lying because they do not allow us to think for ourselves as to what is the truth. A groupthink lie occurs when something bad could have been prevented by a group of people but said group claims they knew nothing about the occurrence. Out-and-out lies are absurd lies you tell someone and they know automatically that you are lying.…

    • 1651 Words
    • 7 Pages
    Decent Essays
  • Decent Essays

    Ericsson, of course, did not condone this but knew that by giving these examples more people would come to terms with seeing the good and evil of it. By acknowledging that stereotypes were also considered lies. Judging one person by their gender, skin color or status and applying it to others, may, in the end, be assuming over real facts. Ericsson states “We lie. We all do.…

    • 856 Words
    • 4 Pages
    Decent Essays
  • Decent Essays

    Does Lying Affect People

    • 706 Words
    • 3 Pages

    Usually the liar will be bail of hurting him/she feelings. People wouldn’t be able to trust them . According to, “Article 2 Rejecting All Lies: immanuel Kant”, In paragraph 3, “ Even worse, it harm the liar himself , by destroying his human dignity and making him move worthless even than a small things”. Lying isn’t always the solvation to all problems. There times when the truth is better because you don’t want to be a liar for the…

    • 706 Words
    • 3 Pages
    Decent Essays
  • Decent Essays

    I question whether to lie or not to lie, I picked that lying is okay because sometimes you have to lie in order to not cause any harms way. Lies, lies, lies why do we lie. Well for many reasons like one of it it's to protect the ones you love. Other times are for lies to get you from getting in trouble and that's called a liar. The lies they tell someone there simply from their tops of their heads.…

    • 437 Words
    • 2 Pages
    Decent Essays
  • Decent Essays

    If They release this information to the public it would create chaos all across the country. Sometimes it is better to keep secrets to prevent In todays society, people lie because they are scared or in neglect of the truth, for the protection of others and to avoid judgment. Liars don 't respect people and people don 't respect lairs. Some lie for the better and some for the worst. But behind every lie there is a reason for the dishonesty.…

    • 771 Words
    • 4 Pages
    Decent Essays
  • Decent Essays

    Double Speak Analysis

    • 1422 Words
    • 6 Pages

    It may appear that lies and double speak are always atrocious, yet lies and double-speak are, at times, also done in respects to another’s feelings. For example, “Telling a friend he looks great when he looks like hell can be based on a decision that the friend needs a complement more than a frank opinion” (Ericsson 408). The white lie was told in the intention that it was to save face of the person it is being told to. The liar did not want to hurt the person’s feelings. In this manner, it may appear that it is a good thing being done but it is the opposite.…

    • 1422 Words
    • 6 Pages
    Decent Essays
  • Decent Essays

    Arguments Against Lying

    • 941 Words
    • 4 Pages

    In other words, a liar can hurt himself/herself by losing self-respect and not being valuable to know the truth of a certain condition. I interpret this to mean that people who are habitual liars should stop otherwise they’ll have a bad reputation. As well as, being like Kant who rejects all lies. As an illustration, Brad Blanton reflects on, “lying is stressful and hurts relationships” (Article 3, paragraph 3). That is to say, if society was honest, our lives won’t be stressful in comparison of figuring out a rubik’s cube which can damage a strong connection.…

    • 941 Words
    • 4 Pages
    Decent Essays
  • Decent Essays

    Today, I will be talking about lying, what it is, how you can tell if someone is lying, and why you should go from lying, to truth seeking. A lie is a statement that is intended to be misleading. The practice of communicating lies is called lying, and a person who communicates a lie may be called a liar. Believing and acting on false information can have serious consequences. We say it’s wrong, although we still do it.…

    • 557 Words
    • 3 Pages
    Decent Essays
  • Decent Essays

    First of all, Lying is sometimes justified since all lies have a cost to the lair. Some people say “yes, but we shouldn’t manipulate the truth, but I disagree because you can lose a person that you will need in life. For example, Cohen says…

    • 714 Words
    • 3 Pages
    Decent Essays