“The harder I tried to assimilate, the more I had the feeling that I was distancing myself from my culture, betraying my parents and my origins, that I was playing a game by somebody else’s rules” (193), Marjane says of her struggle to belong while still remembering her home, of which she has always been so proud. Another factor that contributes to Marjane’s negative change in her attitude towards her country is the way that when she finds herself in a new environment, her culture is suddenly vilified and looked down upon by everyone around her. “I should say that at the time, Iran was the epitome of evil and to be Iranian was a heavy burden to bear” (195), Marjane says, referring to the attitude and negative beliefs that most people in Vienna held about Iran, most of which evolved due to the terrible war that was taking place there. Thus, Marjane became ashamed of her identity, running from the advice that had once grounded her so and, the pride she had once held, even to the point of lying about her identity and roots, which can be seen when she declares herself to be French while at a party in Vienna, “It was easier to lie than assume the burden”, she says (195). As she undergoes this extreme identity crisis and loses track of who she is; becoming addicted to harmful substances and completely changing her personality in order to feel a sense of belonging in Western culture, it is clear that she never forgets her grandmother’s advice, although it is no longer her priority and, it even seems to return to haunt her after she denies being Iranian; “When I got back that night, I
“The harder I tried to assimilate, the more I had the feeling that I was distancing myself from my culture, betraying my parents and my origins, that I was playing a game by somebody else’s rules” (193), Marjane says of her struggle to belong while still remembering her home, of which she has always been so proud. Another factor that contributes to Marjane’s negative change in her attitude towards her country is the way that when she finds herself in a new environment, her culture is suddenly vilified and looked down upon by everyone around her. “I should say that at the time, Iran was the epitome of evil and to be Iranian was a heavy burden to bear” (195), Marjane says, referring to the attitude and negative beliefs that most people in Vienna held about Iran, most of which evolved due to the terrible war that was taking place there. Thus, Marjane became ashamed of her identity, running from the advice that had once grounded her so and, the pride she had once held, even to the point of lying about her identity and roots, which can be seen when she declares herself to be French while at a party in Vienna, “It was easier to lie than assume the burden”, she says (195). As she undergoes this extreme identity crisis and loses track of who she is; becoming addicted to harmful substances and completely changing her personality in order to feel a sense of belonging in Western culture, it is clear that she never forgets her grandmother’s advice, although it is no longer her priority and, it even seems to return to haunt her after she denies being Iranian; “When I got back that night, I