Mr Harvey Summary

As Harvey’s book progresses, he begins to elaborate on how to seal the deal in a relationship. These suggestions include: the make or break questions that need to be asked to determine true compatibility and how long a couple should wait to have sex. Many couples go through the phase of determining “what are we?” The “defining the relationship” talk is one conversation that can easily make or break a relationship if a couple is not on the same page. Harvey is clear by stating that, “[a woman’s] objective is to avoid being on the string. The first step, is to get over the fear of losing a man by confronting him” (Harvey et al., pg. 131). Asking certain and important questions does not make a woman needy or pushing. These questions help women …show more content…
This three letter word can either make or break and relationship. If a woman has sex too soon, it makes her look easy? Or, if she waits too long, it makes her look like a prude? Every female tackles this dilemma when starting a new relationship. Stereotypically speaking, if a man sleeps with a woman right away, he nothing but a man. These labels are not associated with men the same way they are associated with women. The “Influence of Sex Role Stereotypes on Personnel Desicisons,” by Besen Rosen and Thomas H. Jeredee, describe how there is a double standard towards men and women in decisions making. Women, in general, are held to a higher standard than their male counterparts, and the same thing goes for sex and the amount of sexual partners that a woman may have. Men can basically do whatever they want and get away with it. However, when a woman begins to do what a man does, then her actions become taboo. This blatant, sexist, ideology runs rampant throughout Harvey’s book. Harvey believes that when starting a new relationship, women should still wait at least 90 days to sleep with a man to truly tell if he is the right person to start a relationship with. Although, that same standard is not insinuated towards men when they decided to date someone new. “When a man asks for sex, and he is told no, his reaction to that no will tell you everything you need to know about him” (Harvey et al., pg. 159). Harvey is right, a man’s rejection can tell you a lot about the person a women is trying to date, but why can’t the same double standard be used on women too? Does this relate back to men trying to show their hyper-masculinity? Or is this the type of culture in the 21st century has become accustomed to? The article, “Factors that shape young people’s sexual behaviour: a systematic review,” shapes society’s views on sex the