Oprah's Argument Essay: Names For The Children

A sign hangs next to the cradle of Texas liberty, reminding visitors that concealed firearms are not permitted on the grounds. She stops and examines this as if it were new to her, although the sign has been posted for several years now. "Don 't bring your gun to the Alamo," she intones, to see how it sounds out loud, then laughs, startling a little boy. ("Mama, that lady is talking to herself. Mama--") Don 't bring your gun to the Alamo. A nice phrase, but it doesn 't make the cut. She won 't record it in one of her little notebooks, the ones where she keeps her lists of first lines, fragments of poems, names for everything. Names for bands, names for songs. Names for the children she 'll never have and titles for the memoir she 'll never write, although her story packs some shock value, even in these jaded times. Oprah would need a whole week to get it all in. Within the walls, it 's like being in a shallow dish--azure sky above, the taller buildings crowded around, dwarfing the Spanish mission, which isn 't very big to begin with. She walks through the gardens, noting the placement of each plant, each bench, each sign. Change is not to be tolerated. She picks up a cup with a little …show more content…
Now that was a great name for anything--a band, a memoir, a betrayal. It was on all her lists. The world was full of poetry. Pick up a menu, for example, and there was "Shaved Meats, Piled High." That was going to be volume one of her unwritten memoir. She also liked the sign that had hung next to the Tunnel of Love at the old Funland amusement park: "C 'mon Scaredy Cat, Let 's Go Through." Of course, you had to be "this tall" to ride that ride, according to the grinning elf who stood next to the entrance with his measuring stick. By the time she was tall enough, Funland was long gone, its fixtures sold at public auction. Goodbye Scaredy Cat. And goodbye elf, you smug little S.O.B., with your measuring stick and your smirk for all those under five