Verbal Self-Defense Muscle Memory

Are you prepared to face, confront, and repel a bully or harasser? If you are like most of us, you're not! Why? Who wants to think they have to prepare for a bully? We have a social contract with the world. That is 'I treat you with respect, you respond in kind'. But, many people don't respond to our plan for a healthy workplace. Many people have an agenda different from our own - an agenda to harm, intimidate, or control. Sometimes simply an agenda based on fear of the unknown and a bit of paranoia, and poor leadership and communication skills.

Handling confrontations and attacks that come from bullying and fear and incompetence requires PREPARATION!

Physical attacks draw one of 3 responses - Freeze, Flight, or Fight. Physical Self-defense …show more content…
You need words, attitude, and confidence on your side. As a coach who works with targets and aggressors of bullying, I've gathered some helpful practice drills for developing your verbal self-defense muscle memory.

What to say when you're a target of bullying:

Can you repeat that? I'm not sure I understand the relationship between what we're discussing and your comment about my (insert-attitude, behavior, education, race, creed, etc.)
Is that what you believe to be true?
That's quite an assumption you're making. Where are your facts?
Are you sure you want to continue this conversation?
I'm not asking your …show more content…
You're going to come across a workplace bully. They're the same persons who bullied people in the schoolyard. They're going to be educated, professional, and sometimes beyond reproach, and they're going to be your boss, colleague, supervisor, or employee. The better prepared you are to handle yourself in such situations, the less likely you'll respond with intense emotions, and the more options you have. When you're facing a bully, you need to keep control of yourself while you maintain your confidence. Preparation is the