Sometimes holding onto our fantasies and desires of how something could have been, ends up poisoning the reality of what it truly is. In the article, “The Myth of Co-Parenting: How It Was Supposed to Be. How It Was.”, author Hope Edelman discusses her desires of how she had imagined her married life to be and that of the reality that had engulfed her when it came to co-parenting with her husband, John. Edelman takes her readers on a journey of her life shortly after the birth of her first daughter, during the year of 1999 to 2000. During this time her husband also began to spend a lot of time at work, providing for his new family. Thus causing obvious tension between the small family, as well as the struggles she was presented during that
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This idea of fear verse desire can be seen suggested past the pages of simple storybook characters and applied into deeper concept throughout her writing as well as her life. Suggesting that just like the storybook characters, humans are ruled by this “divided well”(25) that has this control in every action and choice we make tend to make. Edelman seems to believe that every human action is activated by one of these two motivators. That they are all driven by one or the other, whether it is our fear of the unknown or our desire to seek a deeper understanding of it. We are all divided by this invisible wall, wanting to overcome it and allow our desires to become our reality. Edelman seems to advocate this desire for equal parenting between her and her …show more content…
Instead, they began taking “little digs” at each other, that in the heat of the moment wouldn’t mean much but “started to add up”(18) over time. Small inconveniences or mistakes that were taken out of proportion in an attempt to cover their underlying fears.Their marriage had hit a type of fear, she expresses her fear when it came to being genuine with her feelings, wanting the truth but fearing the reality of the outcome. After a conversation with her cousin Lorraine, who suggested when it comes down it to it, the desire of “the kind of father he’ll be”(8) should overrule the sexual passion he may give, Edelman begins to remember her first interaction with her husband John, and suggest the reasons that may have sparked her desire for
This idea of fear verse desire can be seen suggested past the pages of simple storybook characters and applied into deeper concept throughout her writing as well as her life. Suggesting that just like the storybook characters, humans are ruled by this “divided well”(25) that has this control in every action and choice we make tend to make. Edelman seems to believe that every human action is activated by one of these two motivators. That they are all driven by one or the other, whether it is our fear of the unknown or our desire to seek a deeper understanding of it. We are all divided by this invisible wall, wanting to overcome it and allow our desires to become our reality. Edelman seems to advocate this desire for equal parenting between her and her …show more content…
Instead, they began taking “little digs” at each other, that in the heat of the moment wouldn’t mean much but “started to add up”(18) over time. Small inconveniences or mistakes that were taken out of proportion in an attempt to cover their underlying fears.Their marriage had hit a type of fear, she expresses her fear when it came to being genuine with her feelings, wanting the truth but fearing the reality of the outcome. After a conversation with her cousin Lorraine, who suggested when it comes down it to it, the desire of “the kind of father he’ll be”(8) should overrule the sexual passion he may give, Edelman begins to remember her first interaction with her husband John, and suggest the reasons that may have sparked her desire for