Personal Narrative: Nola Darling

It was always that section of a survey, job application, or even school assessment that would challenge my sense of identity: “are you black, white, or latino?” I never understood why that mattered, but that little box always taunted me. Growing up with an Argentinian mother and African American father, it bothered me that I could never select more than one box of that section, thus, forcing me to choose. It was when I was a senior in high school when I was told that my skin is black, so I am considered African American in this society. Since then, I pushed myself to only publicize my Latina culture and even to major in Hispanic Studies. I yearned for people to understand that I was also Latina. However, doing so, I only confused myself even …show more content…
She creates a female gaze that I personally connect with the entire time. She is an aspiring artist that is struggling with her art, with paying her bills, and “an identity crisis, embodied by her confused characterization of lovers” (Herman): Jaime Overstreet, Mars Blackmon, and Greer Childs. However, even though it seems like her life's falling apart, she still holds power and is the active agent that pushes the story along. Darling does this by creating a female gaze. She rejects the title of a freak or a sex addict and rejects cat-calling and whistling such as boo, ayo ma, or bitch. She creates posters with those sayings and hangs them all over the city. While I don’t relate with her situations entirely, it is when she does her personal monologues to the viewers that opens my eyes. In the first episode, she explains that she is no one’s property and that she refuses to accept labels from others. She refuses to allow people to paint her life because she is still finding herself. This helped me to truly understand the root of my problem; I refused labels of being an angry black woman or being told what race I am. However, I did not reject the gazes because I simply did not like them, I rejected them because I had deeper issues within myself with my identity. Because of Darling’s strong attitude with her gaze, she did not only …show more content…
She’s Gotta Have It creates a female gaze that allowed me to fully understand why I rejected other gazes so forcefully and why I was not happy. Not only did it do that, but it helped me to establish a relationship with myself. Darling teaching her best friend Shemekka that it is okay to accept her African American culture, helped me to understand that I need to focus on myself, rather than others opinions. Lastly, through Greer Childs, I learned that it is okay to be biracial and to embrace how my identities intersect. Being a mixed woman allows me to embrace two cultures and to be myself while doing it. My race does not define me, I define myself. When reading the reviews, I did learn that some were positive and some were negative. However, what the negative reviews failed to realize is that the inconsistency of Darling is solely to make the show realistic. It is made to help people like me, relate to a person that has identity issues, but embraces them to make themself better. I highly appreciate the way She’s Gotta Have It is produced, and it encourages me to make my own creative works to give young minorities a medium that they can identify