The First Piece Of Feedback Essay

1553 Words Nov 29th, 2016 7 Pages
According to the feedback given on the essay proposal, this paper was adapted in many ways. The first piece of feedback that was provided was to replace the vague statements within the thesis in order to make it more specific. By changing the thesis from the original to the current one used in the paper, it provides more room to be specific, as well as it provides the reader with an exact outline of the argument and where the paper is going to end up. Secondly, the essay proposal provided a piece of feedback in regards to the final essay was to examine only one or two cultural groups. As the research process progressed, it became clear that there was a ton of rich data on many different cultural and ethnic backgrounds that would only make the paper stronger. So in order to make it easier for the reader, I opted to use white- Americans as my core focus of research, and then compared this population to a few others, in order to really show the cultural influence that takes place in regards to the perceptions surrounding autism, as well as the treatment choices. Finally, the last piece of advice was in regards to the journals in which the articles I planned on using were derived from. Due to the similarity of the journals, and how usually one journal has a general view on things compared to other journals, the feedback provided helped to make me more aware that there may be some bias within the research, and to consider alternate perspectives on the issue as well.


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