Have you ever experienced family conflict at some point in your life? If so, has it ever affected you mentally? Emotionally? Many people would have answered “yes,” especially those with an Asian background. Dysfunctional families have plagued Asian American communities, leaving a large number of younger generations stressed out. [insert statistics] Several symptoms include self-esteem issues, anxiety, depressive thoughts, leading to suicide ideation in the extreme case. As for Annie Choi of Happy Birthday Or Whatever, her family has its ups and downs. She tried to balance her duties of being a descent of Asian immigrants, while balancing current trends with her western peers. While having an Asian American background as well, I can confirm
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According to Chen, “The face of family dysfunction, maladaptive self-views and dysfunctional world views contribute to poor problem solving, in turn evoking a sense of hopelessness and suicidal thoughts” (Chen 134). She also adds that, “When adolescents perceive their parents as too controlling and hostile, a perception which reflects lack of effective communication between the two generations, they are more likely to experience low self-esteem as well as higher stress and depressive moods” (Chen 134). Choi felt worthless when her mother was disappointed in her grade. By the time that Choi did well in the subject the she was struggling in, she became a perfectionist. Perfectionism stems from family dysfunction. Family members influence children with their behaviors. This can be seen, especially when Choi’s mother’s perfectionist behavior rubs off of her daughter into striving perfection in her education. Perfectionists’ self-esteem damages when they do not achieve the result that they expect. It is an ego boost when they receive it. But when they do not, they get anxious of what others may think of them, just because he or she is not perfect. In the extreme case of self-esteem issues, one may idealize suicide. The person may feel extremely hurt to the point that in order to not feel such feelings from the damage, they may consider it as their only option. The idea of suicide is a serious matter; in fact, it should never be taken lightly especially coming from a person dealing with family conflict. This proves that the perfectionist behaviors that Choi was influenced by could potentially be the root of suicide. As for my younger self, I would dwell on the lower grade that I received due to the fact that I was expected to well in school. It’s worse when relatives do not understand the amount of stress that I went to. But then again, the lack of communication is also apparent in a
According to Chen, “The face of family dysfunction, maladaptive self-views and dysfunctional world views contribute to poor problem solving, in turn evoking a sense of hopelessness and suicidal thoughts” (Chen 134). She also adds that, “When adolescents perceive their parents as too controlling and hostile, a perception which reflects lack of effective communication between the two generations, they are more likely to experience low self-esteem as well as higher stress and depressive moods” (Chen 134). Choi felt worthless when her mother was disappointed in her grade. By the time that Choi did well in the subject the she was struggling in, she became a perfectionist. Perfectionism stems from family dysfunction. Family members influence children with their behaviors. This can be seen, especially when Choi’s mother’s perfectionist behavior rubs off of her daughter into striving perfection in her education. Perfectionists’ self-esteem damages when they do not achieve the result that they expect. It is an ego boost when they receive it. But when they do not, they get anxious of what others may think of them, just because he or she is not perfect. In the extreme case of self-esteem issues, one may idealize suicide. The person may feel extremely hurt to the point that in order to not feel such feelings from the damage, they may consider it as their only option. The idea of suicide is a serious matter; in fact, it should never be taken lightly especially coming from a person dealing with family conflict. This proves that the perfectionist behaviors that Choi was influenced by could potentially be the root of suicide. As for my younger self, I would dwell on the lower grade that I received due to the fact that I was expected to well in school. It’s worse when relatives do not understand the amount of stress that I went to. But then again, the lack of communication is also apparent in a