Early School Parent Methods

Parent Methods and Early School Environments
Two variables that have not yet been examined when it comes to child development, toys, and gender roles are parenting methods and school environments. How does a parent choose what their child will play with, and how does this tie into the associations made with gender? In her book, The Gender Trap, Emily Kane discusses the issue of parents falling into the “gender trap,” something she coins to be “a set of expectations and structures that inhibit social change and stall many parents’ best intentions for loosening the limits that gender can impose upon us,” (3). By examining this trap, I will discuss the parents’ role in the choosing what toys are deemed suitable for their children, and in what …show more content…
In Wisnowski’s article, Raising a Gender Non-Conforming Child, she recounts the ups and downs she has faced raising her second child, Bobbi (not real name). Bobbi was born male, but from early childhood found greater interest in things such as Barbie and nail polish as opposed to “typical boy toys.” Wisnowski explains that while she was capable of controlling the home environment for Bobbi, allowing him to play with/do what he liked (male pronouns are used in this part of the article), the years when Bobbi started going to school made for new and difficult challenges. “During the early years of elementary school, there was a lot of rage [ for Bobbi ]… I was questioning what was really happening, but was so hoping this was a long phase and that one day I 'd wake up and it would be gone.” Wisnowski admits here that she did not want Bobbi to be different or outside of the norm. Her initial feelings about Bobbi’s atypical behavior and interests were fear and concern. The rage that Bobbi felt in those early years of school could be attributed to the types of toys and expectations that Bobbi was unfamiliar with. Growing up in a home where one could freely be interested in what one wanted …show more content…
Why is it a problem that toys are gendered and that traditional gender roles may be enforced, especially since adults seem to be trying to break these roles; why does a child’s toy matter? Toys matter because of what they are capable of doing and what gendering children’s interests is capable of doing: suffocating the freedom of a person to take pleasure in what they want. Children should not have to feel frustrated that they cannot play with a toy simply because that toy is not for their sex. Similarly, genderqueer children and those who are non-heterosexual are not considered in the toy market, and can therefore go through childhood believing that liking a toy is wrong because that toy is made for other children, when in fact every toy is just a toy. Why should a child not be allowed to play with a toy? In conclusion, gendered toys are a problem because they impose expectations, limits, and gender roles onto one of a child’s most important developmental aspects and fail to just let playing be playing. The activities that children partake in when using toys are stereotypical and gender conforming, and not at all realistic to what children could grow up to be if left to discover their own interests and passions, without being told that they should enjoy something simply based on their