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30 Cards in this Set
- Front
- Back
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communication climate
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the emotional tone of a relationship; a climate doesn't involve specific activities as much as the way people feel about each other as they carry out those activities
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confirming communication
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messages that convey valuing
-these messages say "you exist," "you matter,"you're important." |
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disconfirming communication
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messages that show a lack of regard
-these messages say "I don't care about you," "I don't like you," "You're not important to me." |
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Recognition
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a type of confirming message
-recognizes the other person (returning a phone message, making eye contact, etc.) |
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Acknowledgement
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a type of confirming message
-acknowledging the ideas and feelings of others (listening is the most common form), asking questions, paraphrasing and reflecting |
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Endorsement
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a type of confirming message
-you agree with another's ideas or find them important (this is the strongest type of confirming message--it communicates the highest form of valuing) |
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Impervious Responses
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a type of disconfirming message
-ignoring a person |
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Verbal Abuse
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a type of disconfirming message
-communication that appears to be meant to cause psychological pain to another person ex: "Come here, fatty." "You're such a bitch!" |
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Generalized Complaining
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a type of disconfirming message
-implies a character fault ex: "I wish you would be more friendly." "Why can't you clean up after yourself?" "You need to have a more positive attitude." |
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Interrupting
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a type of disconfirming message
-beginning to speak before the other person has finished speaking (shows lack of concern for what the other person has to say), when it happens occasionally it isn't likely to be taken as a disconfirmation, but when it happens repeatedly it can be both discouraging and irritating |
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Irrelevant Responses
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a type of disconfirming message
-a comment unrelated to what the other person has just said |
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Tangential Responses
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a type of disconfirming message
-conversational "take aways"; instead of ignoring the speaker's remarks completely, the other party uses them as a starting point for a shift to a different topic |
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Impersonal Responses
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a type of disconfirming message
-a response that is loaded with cliché's and other statements that never truly respond to the speaker |
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Ambiguous Responses
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a type of disconfirming message
-contains messages with more than one meaning, leaving the other party unsure of the responder's position ex: A-I'd like to get together with you soon. How about Tuesday? B- Uh, maybe so. A-Well, how about it? Can we talk Tuesday? B-Oh, probably. See you later. |
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Incongruous Responses
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a type of disconfirming message
-contains two messages that seem to deny or contradict each other. Often at least one of these messages is nonverbal ex: A-Darling, I love you. B-I love you, too (said in a monotone voice while watching TV). |
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face-threatening acts
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messages that seem to challenge the image we want to project
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spiral
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a reciprocating communication pattern in which each person's message reinforces the other's
(can be positive or negative) |
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escalatory conflict spirals
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the most visible way that disconfirming messages reinforce one another; one attack leads to another until a skirmish escalates into a full-fledge battle
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de-escalatory conflict spirals
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parties slowly lessen their dependence on each other, withdraw, and become less invested in the relationship
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cognitive dissonance
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an inconsistency between two conflicting pieces of information, attitudes, or behavior
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defense mechanisms
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psychological devices that resolve dissonance by maintaining a positive presenting image
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Attacking the Critic
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a defense mechanism
-verbal aggression, sarcasm |
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Distorting Critical Information
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a defense mechanism
-rationalization, compensation, regression |
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Avoiding Dissonant Information
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a defense mechanism
-physical avoidance, repression, apathy, displacement |
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Evaluation vs. Description
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-a judgmental assessment of another person's behavior ("you" language)
VS. -language that describes a complaint in behavioral terms rather than being judgmental, thereby creating a supportive communication climate ("I" language) |
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Control vs. Problem Orientation
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-a sender seems to be imposing a solution on the receiver with little regard for the receiver's needs or interests
VS. -communicators focus on finding a solution that satisfies both of their needs and those of the others involved |
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Strategy vs. Spontaneity
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-defense-arousing messages in which speakers hid their ulterior motives
VS. -being honest with others rather than manipulating them |
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Neutrality vs. Empathy
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-a disconfirming attitude that communicates a lack of concern and implies that the welfare of the other person isn't very important to you
VS. accepting another's feelings, putting yourself in another's place (doesn't mean you have to agree with the person) |
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Superiority vs. Equality
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-any message that suggests "I'm better than you"
VS. -see others as having just as much worth as human beings |
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Certainty vs. Provisionalism
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-communicators who regard their own opinions with certainty while disregarding the ideas of others
VS. -people have strong opinions but are willing to acknowledge that they don't have a corner on the truth and will change their stand if another position seems more reasonable |
