I Make A Point And Prove Myself Wrong Essay

1386 Words Aug 20th, 2015 6 Pages
I make a point and prove myself wrong. At every turn -- for my entire life -- every atom in my body is a contradiction.
When my father died, the addict in me turned to anorexia. It took me a while to accept the disorder as an addiction, and when I finally did, it was easier to help break the habit. One thing I always like to make clear to non-sufferers is the will and strength it takes to overcome something like that. When you’ve got an anorexic mind, an anorexic thought process, you’re constantly being told (or telling yourself?) these completely irrational, anti-survival kinds of things. That eating something unplanned, or at an unplanned time, or even sometimes not eating something you had planned to, is going to end it. It will be ruined. End what? Ruin what? I don’t really know. You begin to, or possibly always have, deep down, correlate your entire being -- all of your self worth -- into how thin you are, or how much you weigh. If something that used to fit is now too tight on you, you’re a useless human being. If you’ve gained even half of a pound since your last weigh-in (which was probably earlier that same day) you are, again, an entirely useless, worthless waste of a bedroom. Of a desk in class. Of a seat in the car or on the bus. It would be just fine or better if you weren’t here at all.
Now that that is all established, keep it in mind. Even as an anorexia sufferer recovers, gains weight, and eats, those are only the physical aspects. The thoughts above remain…

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