Essay About Hmong Marriage

Marriage is a great and memorable event. Every culture has their versions of a wedding and all, but let me tell you about the Hmong version. First thing first, the couple have to be willing and in love. Either parents need to approve of the marriage because if the girlfriend agrees then all the boyfriend needs to do is bring his girlfriend home. As soon as they knock on the door and when the door is open, the boyfriend calls for his dad and say, “dad, I brought NYAB home.” Nyab is the Hmong word for daughter-in-law. Then father will go get a chicken and holding by its feet, swinging the chicken around his son and nyab saying Hmong blessings and all then welcomes his son and nyab into the house because it’s against the ancestors to bring a girl over to spend the night in the same room, same bed. Once this procedure is done, the son kowtow (act of showing deep respect by kneeling) to his parents and older male siblings. After doing this, the father will phone everybody in the family and set a date for a big, family meeting. …show more content…
When everyone is done eating, the guys sit around and discuss who will represent the house of the family and who will go and negotiate with the other side, the bride’s side. After agreeing on everything, two messengers are sent to tell the bride’s parent, “Please don’t look for your daughter because our son have taken her as his bride.” Small gifts are exchange say money or cigarettes and then the messengers return to the groom’s house with the news of the date of negotiations. If the bride’s parent doesn’t approve, the mother will rush over to the groom’s house and “beat the crap out of the bride” and tries to take her back home. It’s really a test to see if the groom really loves their daughter and they just want the best for