Jordan (2011) applies relational-cultural theory to mother-daughter relationships, which argues that the mother-child relationship continually changes due to social context and time. Therapy can help children rework empathic failures and acute disconnections to question the absolute certainty of poor mothering (Jordan, 2011). I found several arguments in this chapter particularly applicable to my life: immigrant mothers tend to lose the support of a larger family network, and the lack of a connection can lead to an inability to be authentic in a relationship.
My personal experience can verify the concept that immigrant mothers lose support of an extended family network (Jordan, 2011). My parents left their parents behind in Russia and thus …show more content…
Jordan (2011) states that if a child receives an inappropriate response to an attempt to explain their pain or hurt, then that child will not want to share his or her true feelings in the future. This ultimately can lead to a lack of authenticity and consistent lying, which can turn into storytelling and manipulation. A client that I am currently supporting in the community, who we will call Joe, constantly makes up outrageous stories and tells lies more than he tells the truth. This impairs his functional ability to live without support. Joe grew up with neglectful caregivers who did not connect with him. In addition, he in on the autism spectrum, which most likely did not help him make social connections. This supports the argument that Jordan (2011) makes. However, the one caveat to Jordan’s explanation (2011) of this phenomenon - a lack of connection leads to a lack of authenticity in relationships - is that Joe often tells stories simply because he wants to seem interesting; he has minimal social contact and wants others to think he has had some unbelievable experiences. As such, I do not think that his lack of authenticity in relationships stems directly from a lack of connection in his childhood. Instead, there were other circumstances, not directly related to a lack of connection, that led to his current way of supported …show more content…
There are always cultural and social aspects of relationships, and recognizing these can help improve relationships and better understand the difficulties an immigrant mother may face. Additionally, the argument that a lack of connection can lead to a lack of authentic relationships should be studied more, because anecdotal experience leads me to believe it is a correlational, rather than a causal, relationship. Although it may seem irrelevant whether a relationship is causal or not, finding the true causes for end results can aid in preventing poor
My personal experience can verify the concept that immigrant mothers lose support of an extended family network (Jordan, 2011). My parents left their parents behind in Russia and thus …show more content…
Jordan (2011) states that if a child receives an inappropriate response to an attempt to explain their pain or hurt, then that child will not want to share his or her true feelings in the future. This ultimately can lead to a lack of authenticity and consistent lying, which can turn into storytelling and manipulation. A client that I am currently supporting in the community, who we will call Joe, constantly makes up outrageous stories and tells lies more than he tells the truth. This impairs his functional ability to live without support. Joe grew up with neglectful caregivers who did not connect with him. In addition, he in on the autism spectrum, which most likely did not help him make social connections. This supports the argument that Jordan (2011) makes. However, the one caveat to Jordan’s explanation (2011) of this phenomenon - a lack of connection leads to a lack of authenticity in relationships - is that Joe often tells stories simply because he wants to seem interesting; he has minimal social contact and wants others to think he has had some unbelievable experiences. As such, I do not think that his lack of authenticity in relationships stems directly from a lack of connection in his childhood. Instead, there were other circumstances, not directly related to a lack of connection, that led to his current way of supported …show more content…
There are always cultural and social aspects of relationships, and recognizing these can help improve relationships and better understand the difficulties an immigrant mother may face. Additionally, the argument that a lack of connection can lead to a lack of authentic relationships should be studied more, because anecdotal experience leads me to believe it is a correlational, rather than a causal, relationship. Although it may seem irrelevant whether a relationship is causal or not, finding the true causes for end results can aid in preventing poor