Essay on A Web Of City Lights
A web of city lights spreads out thousands of feet below, the top of the Burj Khalifa offering an unhindered view of Dubai. I can see it for all it’s worth; the life it breathes into the world, the people it nourishes…and I think of how I cannot be a part of it. The dry fingers of a desert wind beckon for me to cross over the balcony ledge into nothing, but I ignore its invitation for the moment, taking my time to contemplate the inevitable future that awaits me. There is a darkness that will soon ensnare me in its arms and, with it, an end to my existence.
A part of me fears this end, but another, larger part of me wonders what would happen if I accept it. Would it hurt to die? Probably. Would it be worth embracing it in order to shed the burdens of this world? The tiniest, darkest voice of my thoughts whispers, ‘yes’.
I watch the lights of Dubai in the velvet night. The city shines with vibrant hues of blue and gold, green and purple; tiny, yellow pinpricks of head lights moving along the network of streets like little ants. Towers boasting of elegant curves and sharp edges strain themselves around me, trying and failing to reach my height. To my right stretches the Persian Gulf and if I stare long enough to my left I can imagine seeing the Gulf of Oman over miles of undulating sand dunes.
A cold rush of emptiness overtakes me and I absently remove a golden pocket watch from my vest. It is a very unique watch, one that I am very fond of because it is one of…