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51 Cards in this Set
- Front
- Back
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Concrete Words |
a symbol that represents an actual thing is associated with an object that can be sensed - Apple, Stop Sign, Picnic Table |
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Abstract Word |
in not something that has a material basis speaks to essential qualities - School, Neighborhood, Space, Time |
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Why are words so powerful? |
Words have the power to... affect our thoughts and actions affect and reflect our culture create and destroy |
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Gstalt Labelling |
Narrow our experience fixate on certain characteristics - these become our FIGURE tightens the mental representation in your head |
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Totalizing |
responding to a person as if one label totally represents them student, teacher, minister, homosexual, farmer |
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You Language |
Projects responsibility on to someone else "You are the reason I'm in a bad mood" |
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I Language |
Owns responsibility for what you say Less confrontational More detailed and more productive "I'm just not in a good mood today" |
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High Context Culture |
use language to maintain social harmony by indirect expression of opinions abstain from saying NO directly talk around the point use of silence is admired Chinese, Korean, Vietnamese, Arab, Greek, Spanish, Italian |
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Low Context Culture |
use language to express thoughts, feelings and ideas as clearly and logically as possible strive to persuade others to accept their viewpoint German, Swiss, Scandinavian, North America, English |
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Nonverbal skills |
continuous and includes intentional and unintentional behaviors major component in emotional language |
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Primarily Relational |
serve some utilitarian functions identity management defines relationships with others conveys emotions |
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Leakage |
reveal information communicator does not verbally disclose happens when you think no one is watching real emotions leak through when a person is not concentrating on impression managing |
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Nonverbals that are culturally universal |
smiling laughter crying |
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Kinesics |
movement - study of body positions and motion the way people carry themselves how we face toward or away from someone |
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Haptics |
Touch functional/professional (haircut) social/ polite (handshake) friendship/warmth (clap on the back) sexual arousal (passionate kiss) aggression (shove, slap) |
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Proxemics |
distance how people and animals use space |
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Edward T Hall |
four distance zones intimate - skin to 45cm personal - 45cm to 1.2m social - 1.2m to 3.6m public - 3.6m and outward |
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10 messages of clothing |
economic level / background education level / background social position / background sophistication level trustworthiness level of success moral character |
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Territoriality |
notion that an area is claimed by someone |
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Paralanguage |
non-linguistic emphasis, rate, pitch, volume, tone |
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Active Listening |
giving careful and thoughtful attention and responses to messages received |
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Passive Listening |
reacting to other's messages automatically |
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Attending Behaviour |
fosters mindfulness in us and lets the speaker know we are being mindful to them while they are speaking |
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FELOR |
face the speaker eye contact lean forward open posture relax |
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Pseudo-Listening |
inappropriate or inaccurate responses leakage over-emphasis on certain behaviours - nodding |
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Stage Hogging |
monopolizing the conversation being self absorbed rather that focusing on the needs of the other |
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Conversational Narcissism |
continuously focusing on ourselves instead of listening to the other person more likely to interrupt seek out ways to re-focus attention back to oneself |
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Desire to Fix |
we want to direct, advise, take care of, protect - we involve ourselves actively involves literal listening underlying messages sent - you aren't able to handle this I must step in and help DOING something is the most valuable approach to the situation, rather than being |
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Mindfulness |
= awareness first step towards improvement being fully present in the moment don't let our thoughts wander around - we focus, tune in, we are respectfully attentive |
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Goal of a group |
to develop teamwork the team is to be better together that you are separately as individuals |
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Norms in groups evolve |
a groups internal dynamics actively create its environment values, social structure, social hierarchy of status patterns of social interaction |
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Dr. Jack Kornfield |
Training the puppy bringing the puppy back time after time keep bringing yourself back to the conversation being mindful |
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Group Conformity |
once the norms have been established, encourage conformity with each other maintaining or changing behaviour to comply with the norms |
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Scale of social influence |
obedience compliance conformity independence assertiveness defiance |
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Conformity |
Normal (typical) the accepted view the taken for granted reality a sense of comfort, familiarity, a sense of identity a source for role references |
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Deviance |
(atypical) different, unfamiliar strange inferior alienation, isolation and/or fear a source for questioning and suspicion, rejection and.or disrespect |
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Effective leadership |
engages the creativity in people understands investing in people creates a win/win engages the strengths and trust of the group need high emotional intelligence needs to be creatively adjusted |
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4 steps to making a moral decision |
1 have empathy 2 not overwhelmed by passion 3 choose to be moral 4 have the ability to understand the repercussions |
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Pre-Conventional Thinking |
poor impulse control obedience/rebel orientation: punishment What's in it for me Sociopath child under 10 selfish, impulsive, take as long as you don't get caught |
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Conventional Thinking |
majority of society is here people do things to follow the rules- so that makes them good - not always the case - this results in black and white thinking ethics are present but haven't considered things for themselves |
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Post-Conventional Thinking |
thinking about what your action will bring about tolerance for complexity high emotional intelligence - empathy, patience, reasoning personally committed to ethical behavior people here do not need laws to guide them - they use their morals to guide them approach issues with humility, deliberation, and respect for others |
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5 Conflict styles |
avoiding (lose/lose) withdrawing accommodating (lose/win) smoothing competing (win/lose) forcing compromising (partial lose/lose) collaborating (win/win) problem confronting |
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Passive Aggression |
an indirect expression of aggression that occure when a communicator expresses hostility in an obscure or manipulative way |
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Grace |
feeling peaceful - self=actualized freeing ourselves of anger, blame, judgement of others and what they did or neglected to go just "To be" live fully, love fully |
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Authentic forgiveness |
grace is the process of healing that comes as a gift to ourselves. It is gentle release thus it is authentic forgiveness |
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Forgiveness |
healing concerns just us and the pain we are in can be done consciously-as an understanding to let go can happen with the healing that comes from having a full, loving life that allows us to refocus on the present and to release our identity that is tied to the past |
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Forcing Shark (win/lose) better decisions resentment and hostility |
aggressive behavior to resolve conflicts highly goal oriented achieve their goals at all costs unco-operative, autocratic or authoritarian create win-lose situations advantage-better decisions can be made deterrent - breed resentment and hostility used when- relationships are not critical resolution is urgent - when decisive action is vital |
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Avoiding Turtle (lose/lose) relationship maintenance unresolved conflict |
most difficult - like a shark ignore conflicts rather than resolve them unco-operative and unassertive people walk all over them used when-issue is trivial & personal stakes are not high confrontation will hurt a working relationship little chance of satisfying your wants others can more effectively resolve the conflict |
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Accomodating Teddy Bear (win/lose) win for you, lose for teddy bear preserves relationship exploitation of accommodator |
place a great deal on importance on human relationships gives in to others gets taken advantage of - attract sharks approach is unassertive and cooperative accommodating helps to maintain relationships giving in is not productive used when-maintaining relationship outweighs all other considerations trying to minimize losses -where you are outmatched and losing when time is limited |
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Compromising Fox (partial lose/lose) conflict resolution, relationships maintained less than ideal outcomes, game playing |
impatient owls concerned with both goals and relationships conflicts are resolved by both sides getting something elicits both assertive and co-operative conflicts are removed quickly but can create less than ideal outcomes used when - important and complex issues leave no simple solutions all people have strong interests in different solutions time constraints |
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Collaborating Owl (win/win) best resolutions time and effort required |
values both their goals and relationships views conflicts as problems to be solved find solutions agreeable to all parties used when - maintaining relationships is important time is not a concern learning and trying to merge differing perspectives |
