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178 Cards in this Set
- Front
- Back
The degree to which others consider their relationships with us to be valuable—maximal inclusion to maximal exclusion
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Relational Evaluation
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apparent decreases in others’ regard for us
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Relational devaluation
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people given the “cold shoulder” and ignored—silent treatment intentionally—often leaves the other confused—often become defensive
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Ostracism
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hurt, anger, and fear—perceve others don’t value us enough to honor our commitments—fear and anxiety result from thought of abandonment
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Jealousy
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someone becomes aware of an actual threat to a valued relationship
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Reactive jealousy
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One's partner hasn't misbehaved and one's suspicions do not fit the facts
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Suspicious Jealousy
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Precursor of jealousy in a relationships
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Dependance, adjustment styles, personality traits, sexual exclusivity, traditional gender roles
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Who would wife be jealous of?
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A prettier woman/emotional infidelity
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Who would man be jealous of?
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A resourceful man/sexual infidelity
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how do women respond to a rival's interference?
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seeking to improve the relationship
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How do men respond to a rival's interference?
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Protect their egos
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Who is more likely to try to get their partner jealous? Does it work?
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Woman; no
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intentional behavior that creates an impression in the recipient that the deceiver knows is false
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deception
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most common type of lie
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benefits the liar, wards off embarrassment, guilt, or inconvenience, or seeks approval or material gain
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what percent of lies are given to protect others?
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25%
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who do we make the biggest lies to? But not necessarily the most lies to?
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intimate relationships
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people lie to others and begin to perceive the recipients of the lies as less honest
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deceiver's distrust
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what attachment style and personality goes more with lying
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all styles except secure, but mostly the insecure attachment and out-going
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assuming that the partner is usually telling the truth
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truth bias
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who detects deception better?
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women
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who has more of a truth bias?
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women
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disagreeable, hurtful actions by people we trusted and from whom we reasonably did not expect such treachery
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betrayal
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lying most common among which age and race?
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younger, less educated, white
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who is most likely to lie in romantic partner and business associate?
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men
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who is most likely to lie to friends and family?
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women
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decision to give up your perceived or actual rights to get even with someone who's wronged you
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forgiveness
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what attachment style is more forgiving?
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secure
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two important ingredients in forgiveness
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apology and empathy
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ability to influence the behavior of others and resist their influence on us
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social power
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person who has less interest in continuing and maintaining the relationships has more power
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principle of lesser inerest
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two broad types of power control
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fate control and behavior control
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person's ability to bestow various rewards and punishments on someone
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reward and coercion power
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partners believe that we have a reasonable right to tell them what to do
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legitimate power
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partner adores us and wants to do what we want because they feel connected
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referent power
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partners recognize our superior knowledge nad experience and are influenced by us
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expert power
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specific pieces of info we have that influence our partners' behavior
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informational power
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who interrupts more?
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men
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one person's motives, goals, beliefs, opinions, or behavior interfere with those of another
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interpersonal conflict
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what personality experiences more conflict?
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neuroticism who worry a lot and are impulsive
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What attachment style is more conflicting?
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anxious
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at what stage of life does one have the most conflict?
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teenagers/mid-adolescence
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four events that cause conflicts
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criticism, illegitimate demands, rebuffs, cumulative annoyances
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verbal or nonverbal acts that are perceived as demeaning
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criticism
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requests that seem unjust
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illegitimate demands
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one person appeals to another for a desired reaction, and the other person fails to respond as expected
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rebuffs
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who becomes angry by those who want sex sooner?
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women
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who becomes angry by those who delay sex?
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men
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fighting over whose explaination is right and whose account is wrong
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atributional conflict
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guarentee that partners will have slightly different explanations for their actions than anyone else
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actor-observer effects
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judge their own actions more favorably than others do
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self-serving bias
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both partners wish to evade the issue
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avoidance
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seek to resolve conflict through rational problem-solving
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negotiation
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conflict heats up
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escalation
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who is more demanding and who is more withdrawing?
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women; men
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who is more likely to press for desired change in a relationship?
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women
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waiting for conditions to improve in passive but constructive manner--passive-constructive
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loyalty
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active behavior rying to solve the problem or obtaining advice from a friend--active-constructive
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voice
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passive but destructive manner by avoiding discussion--passive-destructive
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neglect
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leaving the partner or threatening to end the relationships--active-destructive
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exit
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ability to remain constructive in the face of a lover's temporary disregard
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accommodation
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frequent passionate arguments
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volatile
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fight more politely
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validators
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rarely argue
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avoiders
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couples who fail to maintain a 5 to 1 ratio of nice to nasty behavior
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hostile
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partners withdraw without resolving the conflict
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separation
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one partner gets his or her way when the other capitulates
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domination
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both parties reduce their aspirations so that a mutuality acceptable alternative can be found
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compromise
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satisfy both goals and aspirations through creativity and flexibility
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integrative agreements
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both get what they want and learn and grow and make changes in their relationships (good ones)
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structural improvement
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this scale describes use of psychological and physical aggression by responding with "I..."
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conflict tactics scale
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assault rates are higher for what two races?
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American Indians and African
Americans |
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most familial type of violence which erupts from heated conflicts that get out of hand
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situational couple violence
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one partner uses violence as a tool to control or oppress
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intimate terrorism
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both partners try to subjugate the other in a situation that could be viewed as two intimate terrorists battling for control
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mutual violent control
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a partner forcibly fights back against intimate terrorism
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violent resistance
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how likely are women to initiate violence in comparison to men?
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the same
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how do women show violence?
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towards things/objects/kick/bite
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how do men show violence?
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throw knives, chock/strangle, beat up
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what percent of people have experienced shyness?
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80%
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syndrome that combines social reticence and inhibited interactive behavior with nervous discomfort in social settings
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shyness
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experience shyness frequently
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chronically shy
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what do chronically shy people fear?
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negative evaluation from others, poor self-regard, lower social skills
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what volume of music makes shy people the same as not-shy people?
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loud music
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lack social network of friends and acquaintances
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social isolation
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lonely because they lack a single intense relationship
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emotional isolation
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how likely are women to initiate violence in comparison to men?
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the same
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model of loneliness developed by perlman and Peplau holding both personal predispositions and adverse situations contribute to shyness
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discrepancy model
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how do women show violence?
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towards things/objects/kick/bite
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what word should you never use in determining somone's loneliness?
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lonely
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how do men show violence?
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throw knives, chock/strangle, beat up
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what countries most report feelings of loneliness? who is the least?
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italians and japanese; danes
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what percent of people have experienced shyness?
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80%
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what social class is mostlikely to be lonely?
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homeless
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syndrome that combines social reticence and inhibited interactive behavior with nervous discomfort in social settings
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shyness
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how likely are women to initiate violence in comparison to men?
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the same
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is loneliness genetic?
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yes
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experience shyness frequently
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chronically shy
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what do chronically shy people fear?
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negative evaluation from others, poor self-regard, lower social skills
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how do women show violence?
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towards things/objects/kick/bite
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what volume of music makes shy people the same as not-shy people?
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loud music
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how do men show violence?
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throw knives, chock/strangle, beat up
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lack social network of friends and acquaintances
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social isolation
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what percent of people have experienced shyness?
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80%
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lonely because they lack a single intense relationship
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emotional isolation
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model of loneliness developed by perlman and Peplau holding both personal predispositions and adverse situations contribute to shyness
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discrepancy model
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syndrome that combines social reticence and inhibited interactive behavior with nervous discomfort in social settings
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shyness
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what word should you never use in determining somone's loneliness?
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lonely
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experience shyness frequently
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chronically shy
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what countries most report feelings of loneliness? who is the least?
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italians and japanese; danes
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what do chronically shy people fear?
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negative evaluation from others, poor self-regard, lower social skills
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what social class is mostlikely to be lonely?
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homeless
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what volume of music makes shy people the same as not-shy people?
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loud music
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is loneliness genetic?
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yes
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lack social network of friends and acquaintances
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social isolation
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lonely because they lack a single intense relationship
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emotional isolation
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model of loneliness developed by perlman and Peplau holding both personal predispositions and adverse situations contribute to shyness
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discrepancy model
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what word should you never use in determining somone's loneliness?
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lonely
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what countries most report feelings of loneliness? who is the least?
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italians and japanese; danes
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what social class is mostlikely to be lonely?
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homeless
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is loneliness genetic?
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yes
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does past/present family life influence ?loneliness?
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yes!!yes
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can young people be lonely?
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yes
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what age is most likely to be lonely?
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adolescents and young adults
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wanting something somebody else has
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envy
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had a rival and you lost
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fait accompli
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more jealousy in which ethnicity?
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Middle East; because very "one person only"
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which ethnicity least jealous?
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african/nordic
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when bird sits on nest of another bird's eggs/tricking someone else into parenting
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cokolding
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what is the sequence of jealousy?
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cognative appraisal, rapid stress response, reappraisal, and resolution
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having an effect on someone
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influence
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having an influence over a wide range of areas
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dominence
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taking influence to a greater degree--subverting someone else's free will
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control
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legitimate power
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societal
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ability to reward/punish others
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operant power
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ability to be an expert or have more info--male power
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cognative power
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power in how respected you are--woman power
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affective power
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deliberately making a false statement
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lie
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subtle form of lying--confuse the issue to evade the truth
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prevarication
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use ambiguity to mislead
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equivocation
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make up false story
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fabrication
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unimportant lie
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fib
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parents with high love and high discipline
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authoritative
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parents with high love and low discipline
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permissive indulgent
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parents with low love and high discipline
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authoritarian
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parents with low love and low discipline
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permissive indifferent
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lie to ake the other feel better
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benign
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are stories longer or shorter when lying?
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longer
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subtle first impressions when lying
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microexpressions
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when population grows faster than resources allow, then you get compettition
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malthusian
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two great choices
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approach-approach
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something good and something bad in your choice
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approach-avoidant
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no good in the choice
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avoidance-avoidance
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two choices, something good and bad in both
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double approach-avoidance
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key to conflict in age
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maturity
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key to conflict in divisive issues
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similarity
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key to conflict in affect
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not negative affect
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concern with others verses concern with self--who made this model
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baron
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activity level vs. harm level
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rusbalt
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conflict degree vs. engagement degree--who made?
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gottman
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high affect, high engagement
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volatile
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high affect, low engagement
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hostile
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low affect, high engagement
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validators
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low affect, low engagement
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avoidance
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personal constructive tequniques for conflict resolution
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REF (Respect, empathy, forgiveness)
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one party gives up something
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conciliation
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come up with solution satisfying eveyrone
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integrative agreement
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make something more important than the conflict itself
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superordinate goal
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complain-->contemp-->defensive-->stonewall
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Gottman's cascade model
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denial-->anger-->bargaining-->depresssion-->acceptance
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kubler-ross termination model
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love but not loved back and don't care
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unrequited love
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3 C's to getting over loneliness
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contact, companionship, communication
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likelihood of forgiveness
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dispositional
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likeliness of forgiveness by what was done
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offense-specific
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break moral code when forgiving
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harm to victim
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let yourself down/break standards
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harm to self
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two ways to forgive circumstance
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spiritual/natural
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experiencing the pain, realizing need to get over it, change perception of the offencer, forgive
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enright's model fo forgiveness
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REACH--recall, empathize, altruism, committment, and hold on
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worthington's model
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