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43 Cards in this Set

  • Front
  • Back
one big mistake ppl make when trying to change
overestimating the value of motivation and underestimating learnable skills
4 major things to do in PSYCH step
- track progress
- raise awareness
- arouse emotions
- committing
Monique
struggles w addictions to substances, low self esteem, cigarettes and alcohol
Andrew
struggles w women and money; dropping money and women like flies
5 proven methods of defining your goals in a way that will enhance your probability of success
- all about you
- measurable
- be real
- under your control
- positive
all about you
the goal should be done for yourself only
measurable
should be able to track your progress
be real
the goal should be within realistic range of achieving
under your control
literally
positive
i.e. dont say 'i dont wanna spend my money' say..'i wanna save my money'
tracking yourself increases the probability of success
yep
before you can begin to actively change behavior
you must establish your current, baseline behavior
tracking the progress of your goal works for 3 reasons
- keeps your attention on the goal
- provides useful feedback so u know when u get off course
- it is rewarding to see your progress
you can track ur progress thru
a graph, diary, journal, calendar notes, computer, or phone
looking at ur naked pic
- you can see improvements over time but it can also create self loathing. monique felt like that
reactivity
measuring something usually improves it
AEIOU and Y in raising awareness with techniques
-available- within ur reach
-effective
-innovative- techniques that bring creativity to ur change
open to modification
user friendly- simple, teachable skills
you- must feel a connection with the techniques
what wort of self awareness will inform and propel you thru the 5 steps?
knowing the causes, consequences, and cures of your problems
face the facts
seek out info on the causes and consequences of your problem from unbiased sources; possibly ask a professional psychologist or physician if you cant find an unbiased person
ask for trouble
request feedback from loved ones about the costs and consequences of your problem;
see u at the movies
watch movies on ur problem
how long does it usually take to raise awareness
1-2 weeks
if raising awareness doesnt result in deep reflection and determined action;;
its just empty contemplation
awareness without emotion
is like a flame without fuel; its like just telling somebody they should stop smoking
the key
stir up emotions in ways that propel you forward, rather than leave you agitated
we avoid change bc of
fear
neurotic paradox
humans behave to avoid anxiety to experience short term pleasure, while ignoring the long term consequences
let the pain linger
you should use the fear (aka the fear of getting lung cancer or going poor) to motivate you, but not to the point of scaring u off
watch others in pain
expose yourself to other people who are experienced similar struggles; i.e. see amy winehouse's drug overdose
go long
focus on long term consequences
envision a better tomorrow
embrace the positive future ahead
tell a new story
you can alter your self imagine by rewriting your own story with a better ending
push pull llama
one head- you are pushed away from the problem because you cant stand it any longer
other head- you are pulled toward change and a new behavior
= doubles your emotional commitment
4 practices for finding the mid way between too much of a dark past and too bright of a future
- analyze the amount of time you think about the problem vs the time you devote to thinking about the future
- everytime u think about ur problem, try to consider both the present and the future (reflect on both)
- write a goodbye latter to your problem or old way of being
- spend some time in front of a mirror and talk to yourself and vent
Pros and cons
pros of changing cons of changing
self self
others others

pros should outweigh cons
pros will outweigh cons most likely after u do the work in
psych and prep
commit
the power of your choice and the power of your will to see that choice thru
say it loud
like u mean it
push-pull redux
keep thinking of the llama
repeat your slogan
develop a few phrases that capture ur change's emotional meaning for you
internalize your model or mentor
find a person or 2, dead or alive, who manifests what you seek in commitment and to whom you can turn to for inspiration
group action
possibly join a group of like minded individuals who are also attempting to change
NEVER a good idea to rush thru the psych step
mhm