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39 Cards in this Set

  • Front
  • Back
self disclosure
deliberate, significant, not known
Stages of relationship development (Knapp's staircase)
initializing, experimenting, intensifying, integrating, bonding, differentiating, circumscribing, stagnating, avoiding, termination
initiating
greeting, glance, bumping into
experimenting
still not sure about our relationship
intensifying
second date/meeting
integrating
including him or her in your life
bonding
relationship goes public
differentiating
"I need my space"
circumscribing
intentional space, effort
stagnating
"rut", things never change
avoiding
staying away emotionally
terminating
divorce, not seeing each other
reciporcity
a reason for self disclosure, in general, give back because you have been given to
3 dialectical tensions
autonomy vs. connection, oppenness vs. privacy, predictab ility vs. novelty
5 ways to manage dialectical tensions
denial (psychological avoidance), alteration, balance, integration, reaffirmation
autonomy vs. connection
autonomy = make your own decisions
connection = need someone to help you with your decision making
openness vs. privacy
openness = you reveal a lot of info.
privacy = keep things to yourself
predictability vs. novelty
predictability = things become routine and boring
novelty = new events are happening
spirals
someone always seems to pick it up a notch or drop it down a notch (escalatory and de-escalatory spirals)
3 types of confirming responses
recognition, acknowledgement, endorsement
recognition
most basic, recognizing that someone is in the room
acknowledgement
"How are you doing?"
endorsement
agree with or on the same page
9 disconfirming responses
verbal abuse, generalized complaining, impervious response, interrupting, irrelevant response, judgemental response, impersonal response, ambiguous response, incongruous response
impervious response
says something and you act as if you didn't hear it
irrelevant response
"off the wall" response
judgemental response
"changing the subject"
incongruous response
"not paying attention"
6 Gibb's categories
Evaluation vs. description, control vs. problem, strategy vs. spontaneity, neutrality vs. empathy, superiority vs. equality, certainty vs. provisional
Attraction (5 types)
attracted to people similair to us (complementary), reciprocal attraction, competence, disclosure/vulnerability, proximity
Defensiveness - 3 typical responses
attack, distort the information, avoid
verbal aggression
person avoids facing unpleasent information by verbally attacking the confronting face
compensation
a person stresses strength in one area to camouflage a shortcoming in some other area
rationalization
logical but untrue explanations maintain a unrealistic desired or presenting self image
regression
a person avoids assuming responsibility by prentending that she is unable to do something instead of admitting to being simply unwilling
sarcasm
individual reacts a percekived threat to his or her presenting self by attacking the critic with contemptuous, often ironical remarks
apathy
a person avoids admitting emotional pain by pretending not to care about an event
physical avoidance
the person steers clear of people who attack a presenting self to avoid dissonance
displacement
a person vents hostile or aggressive feelings on a target that cannot strike back, instead of on the true target