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30 Cards in this Set
- Front
- Back
- 3rd side (hint)
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Two things that determine the effectiveness of your listening and responding skills
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1. Your intentions and attitudes
2. The phrasing of your response- reflect acceptance, respect, interest, liking and desire |
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Common responses to asking "why?"
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Defensive
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Responses obtained by asking open-ended vs closed-ended questions
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Get more information/details
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Rogers’ study: evaluative, supporting, probing, and understanding statements
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comprise 80% of statements, 20% are of no real importance
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Definition of paraphrasing
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restatement of a text or passages, using other words.
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5 most common types of responses and situations they are most appropriate
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Evaluative- judgment, used when asked to make a value judgment or to disclose personal values
Interpretive- leads to insight, can be used as form of confrontation Supportive- conveys acceptance Probing- helps to provide a clear definition of a problem Understanding- conveys interest and accurate understanding, encourages the sender to elaborate |
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In a conflict of interest, what determines behavior
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Personal wants and needs determine our goals
Our interests are the potential benefits to be gained by achieving our goals |
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5 basic strategies for managing conflict
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(withdrawing)
(forcing) (smoothing) (compromising) (problem solving/negotiating) |
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When to use each of the 5 basic strategies for managing conflict
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When goal is of little importance:
Withdraw Smooth When goal is of high importance: Force Compromise Problem solve |
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Pathos
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* Qualities of a fictional non-fictional work that evoke sorrow or pity. Over-emotionalism can be the result of an excess of pathos.
* Excess can result in overemotionalism |
"You don't understand!!! They killed my dog!!!"
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What is need
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necessity of survival
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definition of conflict of interest
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when the actions taken by person A to achieve his/her goals prevent, block, or interfere with the actions taken by person B to achieve his/her goals
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What is the most common type of response?
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Evaluating
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Major components of anger
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-Usually a defense against something
-Occurs when we don’t get something we want; we become frustrated, thwarted, or attacked -Contains a sense of righteousness and belief that one’s personal rights have been violated; believe we are right and the other is irrational -Narrowing of perceptual focus and priorities; all attention focused on the person and behavior we are angry with -It is demanding; insists that we get our way -Physiological arousal that demands physical action; fight or flight |
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8 Major Functions of Anger
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-Provides energy and increases strength
-Disrupts ongoing behavior by making us agitated and impulsive; interferes with our ability to process information and pay attention -Easy to express negative feelings and give negative feedback -Defense against being vulnerable -Makes us aggressive and antagonistic -Signal that an event has provoked us or that something frustrating is taking place -Maintain a sense of virtue and righteousness -Intimidate others; source of interpersonal power and influence |
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Rules for Managing Anger Constructively
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1.Recognize and acknowledge that you are angry
2.Clarify the other’s intent 3.Decide what to do with your anger 4.Express your anger directly when appropriate 5.Analyze and reflect on your management of anger |
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steps before deciding what to do with your anger
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1.Recognize and acknowledge that you are angry
2.Clarify the other’s intent |
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Difference between assertive and aggressive behaviors
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aggressive is aimed at hurting someone
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Constructive Anger
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-Feel more energy, motivation, challenge, excitement
-Other person feels friendship, gratitude, goodwill, and concern |
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Destructive Anger
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-When you express anger in a way that creates dislike, hatred, frustration, and a desire for revenge
-When you repress anger that creates irritability, depression, insomnia, physiological problems |
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catharsis
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release of pent up emotion
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difference between fear and anxiety
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Fear exists when a person is afraid and knows what he/she is afraid of
Anxiety exists when a person is afraid but does not know what he/she is afraid of |
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definition of shyness
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Shyness is excessive caution in interpersonal relationships
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steps to managing/combating shyness
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1.Understanding Your Shyness
-Pinpoint which people and situations cause shyness 2.Building Your Self-Esteem -Primarily lies with evaluation of self-worth 3.Improving Your Social Skills -Utilize skills in book, active and attentive listener |
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difference between stereotype and prejudice
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Stereotypes: are beliefs that associate a whole group of people with certain traits
Prejudice - unjustified negative attitude toward a person based solely on that individual’s membership in a group other than one’s own (to prejudge) Stereotyping can lead to prejudice |
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Fundamental attribution error
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attribution of negative behavior on the part of a member of a group to dispositional (personal) factors and attribution of positive behavior to situational factors
Example: When a member of a minority group acts a certain way, someone might think, “that’s the way those people are.” |
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Out-group homogeneity effect
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a common assumption that the members of out-groups are quite similar while realizing that members of in-groups are quite diverse
Example: For a white person to think that all Hispanic people are alike |
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Ethnocentrism
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the tendency to regard your own ethnic group, culture, or nation as better or more “correct” than others
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Confirmation bias
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is a tendency for people to favor information that confirms their preconceptions or hypotheses regardless of whether the information is true.
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2 ways to combat shyness
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1. understanding shyness
2. improving social skills |
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