Maths Monologue

Front 1

It was a dark and stormy night in fairyland. A night just perfect for witches.

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Front 2

With fairy godmother in the clink, I began to wonder if we were ready for a world turned topsy-turvy.

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Front 3

Sweet witches and friendly wolves. Wise wizards and princesses with pig noses.

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Front 4

It's a world gone mad but somehow things are looking sunny-side up and we may find some kind of happily ever after in fairytale land.

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Front 5

I was about to call it a day because I had this over easy feeling coming over me... when she rolled in.

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Front 6

She had the figure of a fortress and the countenance of a cobra. She was the goddaughter; the witchiest woman west of Walla Walla.

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Front 7

I wondered if this was some kind of yolk. I had already cracked the case of the sleeping prince.

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Front 8

Fairy godmother was left with egg on her face. The sleeping spell was only the Easter coloring on a much more rotten egg. She had bigger eggs to fry.

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Front 9

And the corruption nearly broke fairytale land apart. Thankfully they had me to put it back together again.

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Front 10

I could continue walking on eggshells around her like everyone else or I could put all my eggs in one basket and say it straight

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Front 11

I knew she was trouble and I told her so. I told her she was like one of those riddles that scramble your brains like, "what came first, the chicken or the egg?"

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Front 12

I told her to beat it unless she wanted to have a talk with all the King's horses and all the King's men.

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Front 13

But then her eyes teared up and I was speechless because I'd never seen this cool egg crack before.

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Front 14

Hey, I've got feelings. I'm a bit soft-boiled around the dames. And this dame needed help. And help is what I do, because I'm

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Front 15

Humpty Dumpty, Private Egg. Hard-boiled detective.

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