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139 Cards in this Set

  • Front
  • Back
Four keys to effective ministering
1. move to higher ground
2. look to the basic underlying needs of your partner
3. Understanding the nature of growth, progress or change
4. speak with a voice of gladness
Identify 8 suggestions given by Elder Christensen that can help couples avoid or rsolve conflict in their marriages.
1. remember the importance of marriage
2. pray for hte success of your marriage
3. listen to your spouse
4. avoid ceaseless pinpricking
5. keep your courtship alive
6. be quick to say, "im sorry"
7. live within your means
8. share home and family responsibilites
Elder Hales taught four principles of provident living. name them
1. joyfully living within our means
2. being content wiht what we have
3. avoiding excessive debt
4. diligently saving and preparing for rainy-day emergencies
Most people think of pride as a sin of those on top looking down on others. However, president benson said a far more common ailment is the pride of those on the bottom looking up. That form of pride is manifest in at least 10 common ways. name them
1. faultfinding
2. gossiping
3. backbiting
4. murmuring
5. living beyond our menas
6. envying
7. coveting
8. withholding gratitude and praise
9. being unforgiving
10. jealousy
President hinckley said that the time has come for all of us to "get our houses in order." to do that, he counseled us to do three things. What were they?
1. avoid consumer installment debt
2. live within our means
3. become self-reliant
Elder Oaks said we are challenged to move through a process of conversion toward the status and condition called eternal life. How did he say we achieve that?
By not only doign what is right, but doing it for the right reason
President Hunter said men preside in righteousness when they do three things:
1. give both quantity and quality time
2. perform appropriate priesthood ordinances
3. honor priesthood and temple covenants
Elder oaks taught three things that are required to achive the spotless and perfected state we have been commanded to reach. What are they?
1. steady succession of covenatns, ordinacnes and actions
2. accumulation of right choices
3. continuing repentance
Identify the other two common faces of pride mentioned by president benson
1. selfishness
2. contention
Leadership of the family, president hunter said, is a man's most important and sacred responsibility. What two things does effective family leadership require?
Quantity and quality time
The Lord Commands men to "cleave" unto their wives. President Benson said that means to stay close to her, to be loyal to her, to communicate with her, and to express yoru love for her. He then suggested at least 5 ways husbands can show love to their wives. Name them
1. Being sensitive to her feelings and needs
2. expressing gratitude
3. recognizing her intelligence by inviting her counsel
4. Giving her the opportunity to grow intellectually, emotionally, socially, and spiritually
5. Being thoughtful and helpful around the house and with the children
Elder Scott gave 11 suggestions on how we can gain more benefit from temple attendance. Which ones would help you?
1. understand the doctrine related to temple ordinances, especially the significance of the atonement of Jesus Christ
2. While participating in temple ordinances, consider your relationship to Jesus Christ and His relationship ot our Heavenly father. This will lead you to greater understanding of the supernal nature of temple ordinances
3. always prayerfully express gratitude for hte incomparable blessings that flow from temple ordinances. Live each day so as to give evidence to father in heaven and his beloved son of how very much those blessings mean to you
4. Schedule regualr visits to the temple
5. leave sufficient time to be unhurried within the temple walls
6. Rotate activities so that you can participate in all the ordinances of the temple
7. remove your watch when you enter the house of the Lord
8. listen carefully to the presentation of each element of the ordinance with an open mind and heart
9. Be mindful of the individual for whom you are performing the vicarious ordinance. At times pray that he
Elder Packer said there are 3 things that will happen to us if we go to the temple in the proper spirit and remember the teaching is symbolic. Name them.
1. our vision will be extended
2. we will feel a little more exalted
3. Our knowledge of spiritual things will be increased
President Benson spoke of three keys to self-esteem. Name them
1. love god
2. do his will
3. fear God's judgment more than mans
Effective communication requires a willingness to set the stage, listen, vocalize feelings, and to avoid judgment. We need to seek to develop common ground and avoid imposing our values on others. There are two ways we can know if we are on our way to effective vamily communication, Elder Ashoton said. Name them.
1. When we have learned to deal with issues without involving personalities
2. when we can avoid interjecting emotion
What we receive or learn spiritually depends, to a degree, upon what?
How we treat our body
The flow of revelation depends on our faith. How did Elder Packer say we exercise our faith?
Making our minds accept or believe as truth that which we cannot, by reason alone prove.
Elder Packer said inspiration does not and perhaps cannot come to us unless we do what?
Ask for it in prayer
One of the most important keys to being filled with the capacity to love others, as Alma taught Shiblon in the Book of Mormon, is to do what?
Bridle all our passions
Love, elder Holland pointed out, is a spiritual gift, according to Mormon, what must we BE and what must we DO to receive that gift?
We must BE true followers of Jesus Christ. We must PRAY for it with all the energy of our hearts
Elder Holland Quoted President Hinckley in saying that most problems in lvoe and marriage ultimately start wiht what?
Selfishness
When did Elder Holland say true love blooms?
When we care more about another person than we care about ourselves
What did Elder Holland say is the most trusting step we take in any human relationship?
To give ourselves totally to another person
What is at least one difference between a tolerable marriage and a great one, according to Elder Holland?
The willingness to allow some things to pass without comment, without response
What did Elder Holland say will surely put any dating relationship in peril?
Separating dating from discipleship
What capacity did Elder Jensen Suggest makes us most lovable to others?
Our capacity to give love
What did Elder Jensen say is the only way we will ever be capable of offering pure, Christlike love to our companions for all eternity?
Only if we love God above all others
What did Elder McConckie say are the two most important things that any Latter-day Saint Ever does in this world?
To marry the right person in the right place by the right authority; and to keep our covenants
Elder McConkie referred to the experience of Oliver Cowdry trying to translate the Book of Mormon. He explained that Olver failed because he did not understand what the Lord meant by asking in faith. What did the counsel imply, according to Elder McConkie?
That he was doing everything in his power to accomplish the goal he was seeking. He was to use very faculty, capacity, and ability he possessed.
When seeking the Lord's confirmation about whom to marry, how did Elder McConkie say you should feel if it is right and how will you feel if it is wrong?
Calm, sweet assurance if it is right; anxiety and uncertainty if it is wrong
The Holy Ghost speaks with a voice that you ______ more than you _____.
Feel; Hear
What did Elder Packer say is far more destructive than many young people realize?
Inappropriate music
Elder Packer quoted Joseph smith who said ____ is contrary to the order of God.
For someone to receive instruction or revelation for those in authority, higher than themselves
What did Elder Packer say will happen if we become critical or harbor negative feelings?
The spirit will withdraw
The spirit, said Elder Packer, does not get our attention by shouting or shaking us with a heavy hand. Rather it whispers. It caresses so gently that we may not feel it at all if we are _____.
Preoccupied
Strong spiritual experiences do not come to us very frequently, Elder Packer said. When they do, what is the purpose?
To edify, instruct, or correct us. They do not position us, unless we are called upon by proper authority, to counsel or correct others
What counsel did Elder Packer give about the sharing of sacred spiritual experiences?
They should be guarded with care and shared only when the spirit prompts us to use them to bless others
We cannot force spiritual things. We can only create a climate that will invite the Spirit into our lives and then must patiently wait for the Lord to choose the time and place for revelation. While we wait, what did Elder Packer say the Lord expects us to do?
Use the light and knowledge we already have to move forward the best way we know how
All of us have times when the Lord will require us to take a "leap of faith." How did Elder Pacekr describe that leap of faith?
It is the willingness to take a step or two into the darkness when we have gone to the edge of the light and see no further
Elder Oaks said revelation can come through face to face communication with god and angels, or through dreams and visions. However, in its more familiar forms, revelation generally comes in what four ways?
1. words or thoughts communicated to the mind
2. sudden enlightenment
3. positive or negative feelings about proposed courses of action
4. Inspiring performances
What are the eight purposes of revelation
1. testimony
2. prophecy
3. comfort
4. uplift
5. inform
6. restrain
7. confirm
8. Impel
What is the principle of "responsibility or stwardship" in revelation?
We are only entitled to revelation within our own stewardships. We cannot receive revelation for others
Elder Oaks said we do not receive revelation for all decisions, even for all important decisions. What is the Lord's purpose in that?
To help us develop faith and self-reliance and to learn to make decisions and experience the consequences of those decisions
In the US and Canada, what are you required by law to take with you to the temple?
marriage License
To be married in the temple, you must have two recommends with you when you go to the temple. They must be signed by both your bishop and stake president. What are those recommends?
2) Temple Recommend
1) Recommend for living ordinances
Neither curiosity nor deep interest in what foes on in the temple constitutes adequate preperation for the temple. A person must have a foundation of faith, repentance, baptism, and confirmation. Then two other preparations should be added. Name them.
1. Worthiness
2. A maturity and dignity worth of one who is invited as a guest in the house of the lord
Why did Elder packer say we should expect the adversary to try and interfere with us as we seek to prepare for or participate in the sacred inspired work of the temple?
Because it is thevery center of the spiritual strength of the Church and is the source of so much spiritual power
Elder Asay taught that both how an individual feels about the church and everything that related to it as well as the measure of one's worthiness and devotion to the gospel could be seen by what one thing.
How one wears the garment
Elder Asay compared the temple garment to the armor of God and the armor of righteousness spoken of in the scritpures. He suggested the garment serves three improtant purposes. Name them.
1. a reminder of the the sacred covenatns made with the lord in the temple. A reminder of the continuing need for repentance, the need to honor covenatns, and the need to cherish and share virtue in our daily living
2. a protective covering for the body--but it won't protect you unless you are true and faithful to your covenants.
3. a symbol of the modesty of dress and living that should caracterize the lives of all humble followers of christ
Elder Scott said no matter what happens to us in mortality, we have no reason to worry or feel despondent if what?
We are keeping the temple covenants we have made and are living righteously.
What are the five roles of mothers as listed by President Benson
1. conceive
2. Bear
3. Nourish
4. Love
5. Train
President Benson warned parents not to do two things. Name them
1. Postpone having children
2. Limit the number of children you have for selfish reasons
Waht promise has god given to women, who through no fault of their own are not able to bear children?
They will be blessed wiht children in the eternities
Women have cliamed upon their husbands for their maintenance, until their husbands are taken, the lord said (D&C 83:2). That, said president benson, is the divine right of a wife and a mother. With that claim on their husbands for financial support, the counsel of the Church has always been what?
Mothers should spend full time in the home rearing and caring for their children
Besides life itself, what did president Benson say is the greatest gift a mother can give her children?
Her time
Speaking specifically to the single women of the Church, what medicine did president Hinckley say is best for lonliness?
Work or service
Prophets have counseled mothers to leave their employment and give their individual time to their children. What counsel did president Hinckley give to mothers who feel they have to work to provide for the needs of their families?
Do your best; make sure you are working to provide for basic needs and not to indulge in luxurious tastes
President Benson identified two basic responsibilities of every father? name them
1. provide for material needs
2. provide spiritual leadership
President benson suggested that family preparedness is more urgent today than in previous generations. Not only does that include working toward having a year's supply of food, clothing, adn where possible, fuel but also includes two other things. Name them.
1. living within your income and saving a little money each month
2. paying an honest tithing
What did president benson say is the only thing that should ever take precedence in a man's life over his wife?
God, not work or hobbies
Surely, when you love your wife with all your heart, said president benson, you cannot do what?
demean, criticize, find fault, or abuse her in any way
President Hunter taught that for a man to be faithful to his wife, he must avoid three things. Name them.
1. Porn
2. flirting
3. unwholesome fantasies
What did president hunter say is one of the greatest things a father can do for his children?
Love their mother
Presiding in righteousness necessitates a shared responsiblity between husband and wife. If a man operates independent of or without regard to the feelings and counsel of his wife in governing the family, of what did president hunter say he is guilty?
Excercising unrighteous dominion
What did Elder Oaks sya is the difference between the institutions of the world and the gospel of Jesus Christ?
The isntitutions of the world teach us to know something, the gospel of Jesus teaches us to become something
How did Elder Oaks define Conversion?
Not just a convincing of the truth, but rather a profound change of nature
What did Elder Oaks say charity, the pure love of Christ is?
A condition or state of being--something one becomes--rather than an act
What did president monson say is the "provider of spiritual strength, the passport to peace" and the door to "miracles"?
Prayer
What did president benson say is the central feature of price?
Enmity
Pride, said president benson, is essentially competitive in nature. we pit our will against God's. When we do that, what do we allow to happen?
Desires, appetites and passions to go unbridled
What did President Benson say disobedience is essentially?
a power struggle against someone who has authority over us
What is the antidote for pride
Humility
Elder oaks said our weaknesses are not the only area where we are vulnerable. Where else did he say satan can attack us?
In the very areas where we are proud of our strengths
Elder oaks siad it is a great strength to be highly focused on goals. Yet, he said, an intense focus on goals can cause a person to forget what?
The importance of righteous means
How did elder maxwell define selfishness?
THe inordinate or excessive concern for self
Elder Maxwell suggested that much of the fatigue we feel in life is actually the result of what?
carrying the natural man
Elder Ashton said differences should not be ignored in family discussions but should be weighed and evaluated calmly. as we do so, we should always remember that _____ is not as important as _______.
1. ones point of view or opinion
2. a healthy, continuing relationship
Because effective communication often occurs when timing and conditions are inconvenient for us, but right for the OTHER person, it will usually require _____ on our part.
Sacrafice
What caution did elder holland give especially to the men of the church
Avoid any kind of verbal or emotional abuse to anyone
Speaking to women, elder Holland said "there is no place in that magnificent spirit of yours for acerbic or abrasive expression of any kind." He then particularly noted three weaknesses women should avoid. Name them.
1. gossip
2. backbiting
3. catty remarks
Elder holland quoted Elder Orson F. whitney who contrasted what we are like when we are filled with the spirit of the gospel and what we are like when we lack the spirit of the gospel. describe the difference.
When we lack the spirit we are pessimistic and murmor/complain. When have the spirit we are optimistic and are quick to obey
Elder bednar said, "Believing that another person offended us is fundamentally false." why
Because taking offense is a choice we make
What did Elder bednar say is one of the greatest indicators of our own spiritual maturity?
How we respond to the weaknesses, the inexperience, and the potentially offensive actions of others.
What did Elder Bednar say is our first obligation when a person says or does something we consider to be offensive?
Communicate privately and directly with that individual
according to president hunter, there are three ways husbands protect their wives.
1. we protect by being completely faithful
2. by not being domineering or selfish
3. by valuing our relationship above any other interests
when differences of opinion do arise, being able to discuss and resolve them is important. However, elder chirstiansen said there are instances when it is best to do what?
Take a time out
With what did elder wells suggest all problem-solving discussions should begin with?
Expressing love and gratittude to each other
Elder Wells counseled us to avoid bringing a written list of faults to problem solving discussions and suggested a rule we would be wise to follow. What was that rule?
limit the number of suggestions you each bring to no more than two or three
What did elder wells say our objective should be in problem-solving discussions
Understanding each other's feelings
what would you say is the main idea of president monson's talk, "the peril of hidden wedges"
Don't let things come between us and other people
In counseling us to tae the initiative to remove hidden wedges, President Monson observed two common reasons why wedges enter relationships. name them.
1. we take offense easily
2. we are too stubborn to accept a sincere apology
What did Elder Ashton suggest is the main reason for quarrels and divorces that occur over money?
the mismanagement of personal finances, not the LACK of money
What counsel did elder ashton give regarding money management between husband and wife?
It should be done on a partnership basis, with bot parties having a voice in decision-making
Every family, elder Ashton said, should have a budget to help them avoid debt. He suggested there are perhaps only three legitimate reasons for going into debt. Name them.
1. buying a home
2. paying for education
3. making other vital investments
Elder hales said, the three most loving words are, "I love you," and the four most caring words are______.
we can't afford it
Whenever we want to experience or possess something that will impact us and our resources, what question did elder hales say we may want to ask ourselves?
is the benefit temporary or will it have eternal value and significance
Elder hales counseled parents to never let hte searching and struggling of their children cause them to do what?
Waver or lose their faith in the lord
What did Elder Hales say happens when we raise our voice in anger?
The spirit of the lord departs from our home
When reading the scriptures as a family, what two questions did Elder hales say are important to ask?
1. what does the scripture meant to you?
2. How does that scripture make you feel?
Elder Hales said some of the most effective family counsels are_____.
one on one with each family member
Teenagers often test family values. When they do, what 7-word summary counsel di Elder Hales give parents?
act with faith; don't react wiht fear
Elder perry spoke of at least 4 rsources provided by the church where information and counsel can be found to strengthen home and family. name them.
1. byu tv
2. church wesbites
3. church magazines
4. church news
Elder perry said the church has established two special times for families to be together. when are they?
sundays and mondays
What are the 5 languages of love
1. words of affirmation
2. quality time
3. receiving gifts
4. acts of service
5. physical touch
How to discover your language of love?
1. what does a love one fail to do that hurts
2. in what ways do you regularly express love to others
3. what have you most often requested of the other person
Four steps to the revelatory process
1. Study it out
2. take our decision to the lord in prayer
3. If the decision is right, it will most likely come as a feeling
4. if our decision is wrong, we will have a stupor of thought.
Four reasons why confirmation might be withheld
1. we are unworthy
2. we have not studied things out well enough
3. we are praying about two alternatives that are equally acceptable to the lord
4. confirmation is withheld to help us grow and becomer more self reliant
Three main ordinance for the living in the temple
1. initiatory
2. endowment
3. sealing
consecration vs. sacrafice
same thing, except with concecration we give ourselves up for a holy purpose
What two characteristics are specific to a man's role
competitiveness
aggression
What does 'rule' over your wife mean to president hinckley?
provide for, protect, strengthen
5 Constants Elder Tanner taught about financial success
1. Pay an honest tithing
2. Live on less than you earn
3. distinguish between needs and wants
4. Develop and live within a budget
5. Be honest in all financial affairs
Why is it important to have regular family home evening?
1. The lord promises great blessings to those who do
2. provides protection against the adversary
3. we are under covenant to do so
Areas for self reliance
1. Resource Management
2. Physical Health
3. Education
4. Employment
5. Spiritual, Emotional, Social Health
6. Home Storage and Emergency Preparedness
ACT acronym for conflict resolution
A greed
C omforted
T estified or taught
A model for resolving conflicts
1. Keep concerns private
2. take responsibility for your own thoughts, feelings, and actions
3. Set the Stage
4. Express your views
5. Explore all relevant concerns
6. Look for mutually satisfying options
Three positive patterns of communication
1. learn to really listen
2. Seek first to understand, then to be understood
3. Pray regularly as a couple
Four negative communication patterns found by john gottman
1. criticism
2. contempt
3. defensiveness
4. withdrawal
Four Characteristics of Gospel Centered Homes
1. family members receive ordinances
2. family members make and keep sacred covenants
3. family members receive gospel teachings
4. relationships are a priority
President Benson's 12 effects of pride on relationships.
1. our desires, apetites, and passions go unbridled
2. we find fault wiht others
3. we gossip and talk about others behind their backs
4. we murmor and complain
5. we live beyond our means and incur debt
6. we are envious or jealous of others
7. we covet what others have
8. we withhold gratitude and praise
9. we are easily offended
10. we hold grudges and are unforgiving
11. we do not want counsel or correction
12. we rationalize our behavior and blame others
Five important elements to understand about change
1. belief precedes change
2. change is gradual
3. change is painful
4. because change is painful, people avoid it
5. permanent change comes through christ
Five ways self-hatred is rooted in pride
1. pride is rooted in thinking way too much about ourself
2. when we tear ourselves down in front of others, is because we don't want them to expect anythign from us
3. pride is a state of opposition
4. self hatred is evidenced by ingratitude
5. self hatred derives from a prideful assesment we have on our power over others
According to president hunter, there are two ways fathers can protect their children
1. by being involved in their social, educational, and spiritual lives
2. by making sure they know the gospel
what are the five constants taught by president tanner
1. pay an honest tithing
2. live on less than you earn
3. learn to distinguish between needs and watns
4. develop and live within a budget
5. be honest in all your financial affairs
We all have these basic needs:
Competence
Intamcy
Validation
Independent
Loved

Well-understood
Appreciated
Reconciled with God
Secure and Safe
Seven characteristics women are endowed with:
1. faithfulness
2. benevolence
3. kindness
4. charity
5. patience
6. love for children
7. spirituality
six diferences from love to infatuation
S elfless
P atient
I ntelligent
C onsiderate
E xcellant
S pirtual
what are two ways we can recognize the difference between our thoughts and revelation?
worthiness
experience
What 3 measures did Elder Oaks say we could use to determine our progress towards perfection?
1. are we losing our desire to do evil
2. are we beginning ot see things as heavenly father and JC see things
3. are we hearing the voice of God instead of the voice of the world and are we choosing to do things His way instead of the world's way
What did Elder Hales say is the key to strengthening our families?
Having the spirit of the lord come into our homes
Three parts of endowment
1. power
2. knowledge
3. blessing
Drawing from the Lord's success formula: "seek ye first the kingdom of god, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you," President Tanner said the foundation perspective we should then have consists of four elements. Name them.
1. seek first the kingdom of god
2. work and plan and spend wisely
3. plan for the future
4. use the wealth we are blessed with to help build up the kingdom
Three things from elder ballard if there isn't unanimity
1. there should always be a desire for unanimity and consensus
2. if differences time exists, allow for open discussion of all relevant issues
3. remember that the ultimate responsibility for revelation lies in the individual
What did elder ashton suggest is an important measure of one's financial maturity after marriage?
Putting your partner's and family's needs ahead of your own spending impulses
Elder wells taught that resolving conflict and achieving unity in marriage requires 3 things from husband and wife. Name them.
1. willingness to compromise
2. commitment to make the relationship work
3. dependence on the lord
Four important roles of a wife:
1. companion
2. helpmeet
3. homemaker
4. comforter
When we are motivated by lust, what three things define our desire
1. selfishness
2. indulgence
3. carnal
President Monson gave three suggestions that will lead us to safety during difficult times. He said if we will incorporate these 3 ideas into our lives, we will have the strength to withstand the adversary. If we choose to ignore them, we will open the door for satan to have influence and power over us.
1.study the scriptures each day
2. pray fervently
3. live righteously
Elder Oaks said, in the final judgment, we will be rewarded according to what three things?
1. Deeds or works
2. Desires of our hearts
3. Condition we have achieved