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92 Cards in this Set
- Front
- Back
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What's brown and sticky?
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A stick.
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What has four legs but can't walk?
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A table!
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Why was 6 afraid of 7?
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Because 789!
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Why did the sheep say "moo"?
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It was learning a new language!
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Where do cows go on holiday?
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Moo York
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What gets bigger and bigger as you take more away from it?
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A hole!
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Why did the traffic light turn red?
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You would too if you had to change in the middle of the street!
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Why can't your nose be 12 inches long?
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Because then it would be a foot!
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What has four wheels and flies?
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A garbage truck!
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What starts with a P, ends with an E, and has a million letters in it?
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Post Office!
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What did the blanket say to the bed?
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Don't worry, I've got you covered!
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How many books can you put in an empty backpack?
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One! After that its not empty!
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What are two things you cannot have for breakfast?
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Lunch and dinner.
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Why did the boy sprinkle sugar on his pillow before he went to sleep?
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So he could have sweet dreams.
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What did one wall say to the other wall?
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I'll meet you at the corner.
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Why was the math book sad?
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Because it had too many problems.
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What kind of key opens a banana?
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A monkey!
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What goes up and down but doesn't move?
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The temperature!
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Which weighs more, a ton of feathers or a ton of bricks?
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Neither, they both weigh a ton!
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What is invisible and smells like carrots?
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Bunny Farts!
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What did the teddy bear say when he was offered dessert?
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No thanks, I'm stuffed!
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When do you stop at green and go at red?
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When you're eating a watermelon!
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Why did the baby strawberry cry?
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Because his parents were in a jam!
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What kind of key opens the door only on Thanksgiving?
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A turkey!
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What disappears when you stand up?
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Your lap.
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What do you call a surgeon with eight arms?
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A doctopus!
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What did the stamp say to the envelope?
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Stick with me and we will go places!
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Which is the longest word in the dictionary?
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"Smiles", because there is a mile between each "s"!
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What did the pencil sharpener say to the pencil?
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Stop going in circles and get to the point!
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Why do cows have bells?
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Because their horns don't work!
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What has a head and a tail but no body?
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A coin!
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What do you call a fairy who doesn't take a bath?
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Stinkerbell!
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What is the richest kind of air?
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Millionaire.
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What jam can't be eaten on toast?
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A traffic jam!
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What is the most musical pet?
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A trum-pet.
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What pet lays around the house all day?
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A Car-pet.
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What vegetable makes the best pet?
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A pet-ato.
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How does a Rancher count his cattle?
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With a cowculator.
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What do you get when you cross a skunk with a boomerang?
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A smell you can't get rid of.
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Which side of a dog has the most hair?
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The outside.
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What has four legs and goes "Boo"?
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A cow with a cold.
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How can you tell if a snake is a baby?
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It has a rattle.
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What do frogs do with paper?
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"Rip-it."
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What lies on the ground, 100 feet up in the air?
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A sleeping centipede.
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Which birds steal soap from the bath?
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Robber Duckies.
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What do you get if you cross a frog and a dog?
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A Croaker Spaniel.
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What did the Queen Bee say to the nosy neighbor?
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"Hey, mind your own bees' nest!"
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What happened to the wooden car with wooden wheels and a wooden engine?
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It wooden go.
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What's bright orange and sounds like a parrot?
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A Carrot.
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What's Black and White and Red all over.
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A Newspaper!
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What sound do porcupines make when they kiss?
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Ouch.
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What's smaller than an ant's mouth?
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Whatever the ant eats.
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A skeleton went to a bar. What did he order?
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A beer and a mop.
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Why did Tigger look in the toilet?
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He was looking for Pooh.
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What did the ocean say to the shore?
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Nothing, it just waved!
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How can you tell the difference between a can of chicken soup and a can of tomato soup?
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Read the label
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What do you serve that you cannot eat?
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A tennis ball
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What doesn't get any wetter, no matter how much rain falls on it?
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Water
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Who can shave 25 times a day and still have a beard?
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A barber
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What kind of room has no windows or doors?
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Mushroom
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When is it bad luck to meet a white cat?
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When you're a mouse.
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There is one word in the English language that is always pronounced incorrectly.
What is it? |
incorrectly
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What animal doesn't play fair?
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the cheetah
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Why don't lobsters share?
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They're shellfish
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What gets wetter and wetter the more it dries?
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A towel
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Take off my skin, I won't cry, but you will. What am I?
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An onion
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What's full of holes but still holds water?
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A sponge!
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Why did the teacher write the lesson on the windows?
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He wanted the lesson to be very clear!
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What starts with a T, ends with a T, and is full of T?
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A teapot!
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What has 3 feet and no legs?
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A yardstick!
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What do you get when you cross a parrot with a centipede?
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A walkie talkie!
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What has six eyes but cannot see?
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Three blind mice!
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What does a kitten become after it's three days old?
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Four days old!
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Why is it hard to play games in the jungle?
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There are too many cheetahs!
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Which bird can lift the most weight?
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A crane!
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Why are elephants wrinkled?
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Have you ever tried to iron one?
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What did one flea say to the other flea?
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Shall we walk or take the dog?
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What’s small and cuddly and bright purple?
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A koala holding his breath!
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What do you call a pig with three eyes?
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A Piiig!
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What’s the difference between an injured lion and a wet day?
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One pours with rain, the other roars with pain!
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What kind of animal goes OOM?
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A cow walking backwards!
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What did the duck say when he bought lipstick?
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Put it on my bill!
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Where would you find a cat with no legs?
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Exactly where you left it!!!
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Why did the dalmation hate playing hide-n-go-seek?
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He was always spotted!
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Why can't penguins fly?
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They can't afford plane tickets!
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What kind of bed does a mermaid sleep in?
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A water bed!
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What did one ear say to the other ear?
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Between us we have brains!
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What did one magnet say to the other magnet?
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I find you very attractive!
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What do you get when you cross a werewolf with a dozen eggs?
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A very hairy omelet.
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What is a lamb's favorite thing to eat?
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Baaa Baaa Que!
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Which runs faster, hot or cold?
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Hot. Anyone can catch cold.
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What did Zero say to Eight?
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Nice belt!
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