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60 Cards in this Set
- Front
- Back
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Les 6 chiffres préférés d'une poule |
444719 |
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Mr et Mme Fly ont 3 fils, comment s'appelle a t-ils ? |
Abdel Yves Hakim |
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Le blé ou le mouton ? |
Dans le moulin |
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Pourquoi un escargot traverse la route quand il pleut ? |
Pour aller de l'autre côté |
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5 ants move out in house with 5 other ants |
They become tenants |
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Tu as neuf carottes, pas de briquets, pas de feu et tu veut les cuisiner comment tu fais ? |
Tu en manges une et les carottes sont cuites |
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You have a pack of cigarettes, and no fire to lighter then, how do you proceed ? |
You throw one away then the boat becomes "a cigarette lighter" |
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My girlfriend told me I'm the cheapest man in the world |
I don't buy it |
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My wife told me to put ketchup on the shopping list |
Now I can't see anything |
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What generation was Forrest Gump ? |
Gen A Jenny |
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My wife asked me if I would stop to sing wonderwall randomly |
I SAID MAYBE |
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My wife told me to stop singing "I'm a believer" or she would leave me. I thought she was kidding |
BUT THEN I SAW HER FACE |
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What's better than eating a mandarine ? |
Eating Amanda out |
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La population de la Suisse est seulement de 8M d'habitants. Elle augmente mais très lentement. Vous savez pourquoi ? Thomas Wiesel, Montreux |
Vous avez déjà essayé de niquer après une raclette ? |
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I burned 2000 calories today |
I left my food in the oven too long |
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Why you shouldn't fart in an apple store |
They don't have windows |
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What happens when you crash the car listening to Adele |
You end up rolling in the jeep |
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Why is the inventor of the set of teeth isn't funny at all ? |
Because he gave to his invention de name denture instead of substitooth |
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What's your idea of a prefect date ? |
DD/MM/YYYY other are annoying |
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I asked my boss if I could have time off work because I was having a baby. The boss : Was it a boy or a girl ? |
I don't know, I will tell you in 9 months |
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Every day I announce to my family that I am going Jogging and then I don't go |
That's a running joke |
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How I am sure that the earth is flat ? |
Well it's composed with 70% uncarboned water |
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If your kids refuse to eat fish later, what do you think would be a good replacement ? |
Cats because cats love fish |
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There is a man entering a bar and while ordering his drinks, he pulls out of his pocket a 11 inch piano and starts playing it. The bartender says "I'm sure it is none of my business but where did you find a 11 inch piano ? The guy goes, there is a genius outside, I'm sure he is still there if you hurry The bartend runs outside and a moment later a bunch of ducks comes in through the front door starting causing a big ruckus The bartenders shouts, you didn't tell me the genius was deaf. I asked a million bucks and I got a million ducks! The guy replies : |
Do you really think I asked an 11 inch pianist ? |
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How to say Hi in Mandarin ? |
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Hey Laurianne, Ton téléphone serait pas dans ta poche ? |
Il y a ton cul qui m'appelle |
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Tu me fais penser à un appareil photo tu sais pourquoi ? |
A chaque fois que je te vois je souris |
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Combien de temps faut-il à un Guadeloupéen pour devenir un goudeloupédeux ? |
Un an! Car dans un antillais |
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Where do lézards go to fix their fallen tails ? |
To the retail shop |
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Ma montre elle dit que tu n'as pas de sous vêtements tu sais pourquoi ? |
Ah non en fait elle a 20 minutes d'avance |
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Tu serais pas charpentier ? |
C'est une sacrée poutre que tu as |
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Tu serais pas pompier |
J'ai sacrément envie de te pépom |
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Tu aurais pas un pansement ? |
Je suis tombé sur ton charme |
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Tu serais pas une porte de sortie ? |
Parce que tu m'exit grave |
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Tu serais pas italienne ? |
Car avec toi je serais ravioli |
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J'ai beaucoup de problèmes j'en ai 70 mais peut être que si j'en règle un avec toi |
J'en aurais 69 |
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Tu ferais pas de la boxe par hasard ? |
Parce que je te trouve hypercute |
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J'aurais bien aimé que tu sois un Doliprane |
Parce que je t'aurais bien cassé en deux |
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T'es plutôt team monter le mont blanc en un jour ou descendre le montbazillac en 1 minute ? |
:) |
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What's the common point between the gynecologist and a pizza delivery guy ? |
They can smell it but not eat it |
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If I ask you to pick up a number between 1 and 100, which one would you go for ? |
Alors 37 or 73 ? |
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Tu sais pourquoi il faut toujours rester soi même et ne pas essayer de faire bonne impression ? |
Parce-nous ne sommes pas une imprimante ? |
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Tu serais pas un astéroïde ? |
Parce que j'ai envie que tu m'exploses la lune |
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What does Beethoven do in his grave ? |
He decomposes |
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Why do black people only make nightmares ? |
Because the last one who had a dream was shot |
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T'as pas le bluetooth sur ton téléphone ? |
T'es connectée à mon coeur ? |
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C'est un bossu qui prend la foudre.. |
Et ça le foudroie |
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if I could rearrange the alphabet |
I’d put ‘U’ and ‘I’ together. |
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Are you from Tennessee? |
Because you're the only 10 I see! |
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I'm no photographer |
but I can picture us together. |
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Are you a Netflix show? |
Because I want to binge watch you all night |
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Are you a bank loan? |
Because you’ve got my interest. |
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Quand est ce que le cul de la poule est le plus dilaté ? |
Quand elle passe du coq à l'âne |
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Melon et Melèche achètent un appartement Melon lâcheté |
Et Melèche l'habite |
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What's a security guard at a Samsung store |
Guardian of the galaxy |
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When you are cold in your house you can go to the corner |
It's 90 degrees there |
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What kind of apples grows on trees ? |
All of them |
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Que dit un garagiste quand il pète |
Mon joint de cul lâche |
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What's the difference between a frigo and a butt hole ? |
The frigo does not fart when you put the meat out |
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Which side of the chicken has more feathers ? |
The outside part |
