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39 Cards in this Set
- Front
- Back
- 3rd side (hint)
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Dialectical Theory:
main premise |
Inherent in all relationships is an ongoing struggle/tension between opposite wants and desires.
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tension, struggle
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Dialectical Theory:
3 main dialectical tensions & examples from Someone Like You |
1. autonomy-connection: struggle between separateness and togetherness.
2. openness-closedness: increased self disclosure vs privacy. 3. novelty-predicability: wanting new things vs our comfort zone |
1. Jane wants to have nothing to do with Eddie, and then she wants him on New Years
2. Jane opens up to Eddie but won't let him see her work. 3. Ray's desire for Jane and Diane |
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Three main interpersonal needs
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1. inclusion
2. control (over our own lives and our partner's) 3. affection |
I want to be invited to hang out with Nick and his friends, I want him to not hang out with them if I don't want him to or not hang out with him if I don't want to, and I want him to give me hugs and kisses and tell me he loves me.
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Complementary Relationships
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One person wants something and the other person does or does not want to give it.
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Mom doesn't want to cook but Dad does.
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Symmetrical Relationships
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You both want the same things.
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Mom and Dad both want to support Clayton and I, and they want the hospital to do well.
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Overhelping
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Helping someone to the point that their success is attributed to you.
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If Clayton isn't doing well in school so I start doing his hw and his grades get better.
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Sandbagging
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When you're in a fight and you back up and then they let their guard down and then you go in for the kill
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When Nick and I wrestle, I yell OW! and he let's go and then i attack him.
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Implicit Personality Theory
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We have an idea of what personality characteristics go together. We fill in the gaps of their personality from what we do know about them.
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Jake says dumb stuff in class so I think he just sucks all the time.
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Perceptual Anesthesia
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We have a stream of consciousness that continues while we're interacting with someone and it affects your perception of them.
so, what you think that someone thinks of you influences how you think of yourself. |
When I talk to my teachers, I think they think I'm a slacker, so I get worried that I am.
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Pollyanna Principle
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In general, we tend to view others, our relationships, and other's relationships in a positive light.
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When i meet someone i usually assume they're a good person.
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Romeo and Juliet Effect
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Our perceptions of our relationships is affected by our parent's perceptions, and then we do the opposite of what they want.
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Romeo and Juliet's parents didn't want them to be together, so they wanted each other more.
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Independent Self-Construal
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When one defines themselves by their individual success.
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I am a hard worker, I scored the winning goal.
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Relational Self-Construal
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When one defines themselves by their relationships' success.
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I am a good mother, my family is very happy, my group works well together.
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What reasons do Gore et al. (2006) provide for studying roommates?
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1. It allows you to look at the beginning of a developing relationship.
2. Living together moves relationships along more quickly. 3. The roommates are randomly put together, meaning greater variety. 4. Roommate relationships are difficult to exit. |
4 reasons.
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What do Gore et al. (2006) argue that people with high relational self-construals do in their interpersonal relationships?
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Even when the relationship is not doing well, they still work at it by making conversation and providing self disclosure.
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High relational self-construal means you measure yourself by your relationships' success.
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What 2 levels of meaning does all communication have?
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1. Content level: the literal meaning
2. Relational level: what the message says about the relationship. |
I say "Nick, you didn't tell me you had work today."
I'm saying that he has work and didn't tell me. But I also mean that I came down to visit because I though he didn't have work and now that I know he does, I'm pissed. |
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5 stages of relational development from the staircase model.
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1. initiation: you're just meeting, the conversation is stylized and there are low levels of self disclosure.
2. experimenting: slight increase in self disclosure, testing out to see if you like this person. 3. intensifying: there is disclosure about the relationship itself (I really like you), develop idioms (nicknames), you idealize the other person and the relationship, and you revise (talk about the relationship in more realistic terms) 4. integrating: you introduce each other to your friends, your lives become more interconnected, "we" instead of I, exchange of intimacy trophies (a necklace, letterman jacket) 5. Bonding: marriage, living together. |
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How can relationships move through the staircase model? What do Knapp and Vangelisti mean when they say that movement within the model is always to a new place?
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Movement within the staircase model is not always fluid-- you skip steps, stumble back down them, hang out at one for a while, etc.
You always move to a new place though because your lives change, you don't reshare the same information or moments. |
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Social Exchange Theory
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We're in relationships where there is some reward.
Cost-benefit analysis of relationships-- the benefits have to outway the costs for us to be in the relationship. |
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What are the 4 bases of attraction?
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1. interpersonal rewards: cost-benefit analysis.
2. proximity: physical closeness; you're more likely to end up with people you're physically close to. 3. similarity: how similar you are to the other person, what you have in common. 4. physical attraction: we tend to pair up with people who are of the same level of attractive as ourselves, and we tend to view pretty people as good people (halo effect) |
Being in a relationship with Nick makes me happy, we spend a lot of time together, we have a lot in common, and he's a hottie.
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Network Overlap
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the coming together of different networks.
ex: when you ask a coworker about a problem with another friend or when you and your boyfriend have mutual friends. |
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What 3 areas does Marks (1986) say married couples must balance?
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1. inner self: things you do just for yourself
2. primary relationship: a best friend, bf/gf, husband/wife 3. outside interests: work, school, other relationships. |
me, nick, and school.
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What is the female dater-female friend link that Loving (2006) found and what explanation does he provide for it?
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The female dater and the female friend have a similar and more accurate view of the relationship. Women are better at predicting the fate of the relationship because they spend so much time talking to about their relationships than men.
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What does Loving (2006) mean when he says that researchers should "move out of the dyadic box"?
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Researchers should not just look at the relationship itself, but the surrounding networks and relationships.
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Whose argument does Lorentzen point out in separating northern ecofeminists from southern ecofeminists perspectives?
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Lorentzen takes Rosemary Ruether’s analysis of northern vs southern ecofeminists.
She says that southern ecofeminists are... 1. concerned with the reality of day to day life 2. less likely to idealize their own indigenous traditions AND utilizing, appreciating and valuing what is empowering and healinG 3. less likely to make blanket oppositions between all things Western and Christian as evil and all things from their own culture as good, and vice versa. |
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What is the oppressive patriarchal framework? What are its specifics? How does it affect women and nature?
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The oppressive patriarchal framework is a conceptual framework that explains, justifies and maintains a relationship of domination and subordination of women by men and men over nature.
Part of this includes: 1. value hierarchical thinking 2. value of dualism 3. logic of domination—a structure of argumentation which leads to justification of subordination of women and nature. |
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How do the 5 precepts relate to an ecological Buddhism?
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1. Nonviolence, or ahimsa. Abstaining from injury to all life includes both human and nature.
2. Abstain from taking things not freely given. This can apply to nature in numerous ways. |
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What is the Eightfold Path?
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- Right Thought
- Right Intention - Right Speech - Right Action - Right Livelihood - Right Effort - Right Mindfulness - Right Concentration |
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What is considered “the Triple Refuge” or Three Jewels for Buddhists?
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Buddha, Dharma and the Sangha.
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What does Rita Gross say about how one should get a handle on trishna, especially in light of consumption?
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Gross states that the compulsions of greed, thoughtless consumption and thoughtless reproduction could be countered by the Buddhist practices of mediation and mindfulness.
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What is “idiot compassion” as spelled out by Gross?
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when people do not think about what they are giving to another and why; It is the opposite of disciplined giving
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Give three examples of the “Greening” of Buddhist practice.
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1. Buddhist Centers (including Green Gulch) practicing conservation and reducing waste
2. Buddhist retreats that includes backpacking and pilgrimage 3. Buddhist meditation being used before ecological work by non profits 4. Buddhist families creating spiritual ecological practices as a family |
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What political acts were passed in the 1970’s by the USA Congress to support ecology (found in the Kaza article)?
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1. Marine Mammal Act
2. Endangered Species Act 3. National Environmental Protection Act. |
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What does Kaza say are the main differences between an Buddhist environmentalist and other environmentalists?
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1. The belief in Ahimsa, and the support Buddhists have from the Buddha, Dharma and Sangha.
2. The belief in whole, non dualistic thinking 3. The belief that intention is as important as action (thus meditation is key) 4. The practice of the detachment from the ego (they aren't an environmentalist b/c they will gain something from it). |
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What is the difference between Ecowomanism and Ecofeminism?
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Ecowomanism was coined by African American womanists; the belief is that race is a key component of Ecofeminism that is sometimes overlooked, thus ecowomanists will highlight the experience of African American women and others overlooked by a “White” ecofeminism.
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What does the Vandana Shiva quote “The myth that movements are created and sustained by charismatic leaders from outside is shattered” mean?
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the quote refers to her examples of women in India (ie the Chipko women) who are ordinary women providing extraordinary leadership in ecological protection and other movements.
Shiva was pointing out that movements don’t need to wait for charismatic leaders, that strong women from within a community can and do lead ecological movements around the world. |
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What does Lois Lorentzen’s article “Indigenous Feet: Ecofeminism, Globalization and The Case of Chiapas” say about ecofeminist practice?
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Lorentzen was pointing out that sometimes the lens of ecofeminism can be limited in specific contexts, such as Chiapas.
In Chiapas, women and men are perceived as too close to nature (in a patriarchal framework). Women hold the cultural rituals- not the men. Women have rights that protect them, but they don’t mention women and nature. And women get more power within the community when they reach the end of their childbearing years. Thus, Lorentzen concludes that ecofeminism is better as a large lens to look at the structural system that keeps women, men and nature oppressed, but not specifically women in Chiapas. |
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Whose argument does Lorentzen point out in separating northern ecofeminists from southern ecofeminists perspectives?
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Lorentzen takes Rosemary Ruether’s analysis of northern vs southern ecofeminists.
She says that southern ecofeminists are... 1. concerned with the reality of day to day life 2. less likely to idealize their own indigenous traditions AND utilizing, appreciating and valuing what is empowering and healinG 3. less likely to make blanket oppositions between all things Western and Christian as evil and all things from their own culture as good, and vice versa. |
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What is the oppressive patriarchal framework? What are its specifics? How does it affect women and nature?
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The oppressive patriarchal framework is a conceptual framework that explains, justifies and maintains a relationship of domination and subordination of women by men and men over nature.
Part of this includes: 1. value hierarchical thinking 2. value of dualism 3. logic of domination—a structure of argumentation which leads to justification of subordination of women and nature. |
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