Chapter 9 Interpersonal Staying Close

Front 1

because having a close relationship is a key determinant of overall happiness--

Back 1

people who have trouble maintaining close relationships with others are often lonely, depressed and may doubt their self worth

Front 2

45 to 50 percent of people in the US get divorced

Back 2

and parental satisfaction drops after parenthood

Front 3

relational maintenance

Back 3

1. involves keeping a relationship in existence
2. keeping a relationship in a specified state or condition or at a stable level of intimacy
3. involve keeping a relationship in satisfactory condition
4. keeping a relationship in repair
*keeping a relationship at a desired level

Front 4

behaviors used to maintain relationships

Back 4

1. pro- social maintenance : positive behaviors that promote relational closeness, trust, liking.
a. positive, open, assurance, social networking and task sharing.
2. anti-social maint: go over in a couple cards.

Front 5

more prosocial =

Back 5

more stable and positive

Front 6

relational satisfaction

Back 6

pleasure or enjoyment that people derive from their relationships

Front 7

positivity
2. openness and routine
3. assurance
4. social networking
5. task sharing
6. supportiveness
7. joint activities
8. romance and affection
9. humor
10. constructive conflict management

Back 7

acting cheerful, giving compliments
2. talking and listening to one another (self disclosure, sharing secrets, asking about partners day)
3. giving each other assurances about commitment
4. spending time with each others friends and family events. accepting each others friends
5. household chores and financial development together
6. giving each other support and encouragement
7. hanging out, sports, shopping together, activities together.
8. revealing positive caring feelings for one another, i love you, romantic dinner
9. inside jokes, sarcasm
10. managing conflict, LISTENING to one another's positions, trying to come up with solutions.

Front 8

anti-social maintenance:

Back 8

negative behaviors used to maintain relationships. may decrease the satisfaction. may try to change the partner.

Front 9

1. avoidance
2. no flirting
3. talking about others
4. jealousy induction
5. spying
6. infidelity
7. allowing control
8. destructive conflict

Back 9

1. evading (escape/avoid) the partner on certain issues. planning separate activity, respecting each others privacy
2. refraining from flirting to show you are not interested in a romantic relationship
3. talking about someone else to show you already have a special relationship with someone
4. attempt to make your partner jealous.. leave a note from a secret admirer out. flirt with someone in front of your partner
5. text messages, ask friends
6. engaging in sexual activity with someone else (making out with someone)
7. focusing just on the partner (ignoring your friends so you can spend time with your partner, letting your partner make all decisions)
8. using destructive conflict to control the partner (yelling at your partner if if he/she doesn't do what you want, starting arguments so you can tell your partner how she or he should act)

Front 10

modality

Back 10

channel of communication : words, facial expression, vocal tone, letter. behavior can be interpreted differently. constant writing on face-book walls to keep in contact.