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52 Cards in this Set

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  • Back

Hm? I'm sorry, what? We're you talking to me?

I went to the zoo and then I walked until I came here. Have I been walking north?

North? Why.. I think so. Let me see.

Is that fifth avenue?

why ya, yes it is.

and what's that cross-street over there. The one to the right?

That? Oh, that's seventy-fourth street.

And the zoo is around sixty-fifth street, so I've been walking north.

Yes, it would seem so.

Good ol' north.


but not due north

I... Well, no. I suppose not. but we call it north. It's northerly.

Well boy, well you're not going to get lung cancer, now are you?

No sir, not from this.

No sir, what you'll probably get is one of those things Freud wore after they took the whole side of his jaw away. What did they call those things?

A prosthesis?

The very thing! A prosthesis! You're an educated man aren't you? Are you a doctor?

Oh, no no. I read about it somewhere. Time magazine I think.

Well Time Magazine is not for blockheads.

No, I suppose not.

Boy, I'm glad that's fifth avenue there.


I don't like the west side of the park much.

Oh? Why?

I don't know


Do you... Mind if we talk?

Why. . . no.. no.

Yes, you do. you do.

No, really, I don't mind.

Yes, you do.

No, I don't mind at all. Really.

It's... A nice day.

Yes, it is, lovely.

I've been to the zoo.

Yes, I think you've said so... Didn't you?

You'll read all about it in the paper tomorrow if you don't see it on the TV tonight. You have TV don't you?

Why, yes, we have two. One for the children.

You're married!

Why certainly.

Well it isn't a law for god's sake

No... No, of course not.

And you have a wife.


And you have children.

Yes, two.


No, girls. Both girls.

But you wanted boys.

Well, naturally every man wants a son, but...

But that's the way the cookie crumbles?

I wasn't going to say that

And you're not going to have anymore kids, are you?

No, no more. Why did you say that? How could you possibly know that?

The way you crossed your legs perhaps, something in the voice, or maybe I'm just guessing. Is it your wife?

That's none of your business! Do you understand! Well you're right. We will have no more children.

That IS the way the cookie crumbles

Yes... I guess so.

Well now, what else?

What were you saying about the zoo? That I'd read about it or see?

I'll tell you about it soon. Do you mind if I ask you questions?

Oh, not really.

I'll tell you why I do it. I don't talk to many people except to say like, give me a beer, or where's the john, or, what time does the feature go on? or keep your hands to yourself buddy. You know, I to the A power, things like that.

I must say I don't

But every once in a while I like to talk to somebody, like really talk, like get to know somebody. Know all about them

And am I the guinea pig for today?

On a sun drenched sunday afternoon like this? Who better than a nice married man with two daughters and um... A dog? No? Two dogs? Huh, strange, I took you for an animal man... Cats! Yes cats, but no that couldn't have been your idea... But your wife and daughters! Is there anything else I should know?

There are... Two parokeets.


My daughters keep them in a cage in their bedroom.

Do they carry disease? The birds?

I don't believe so.

That's too bad. If they did, you could set them loose in the house and they cats could eat them and die! Maybe. Well now, what else? What do you do to support your enormous household?

I have an executive position with a small publishing house. We publish text books.

That sounds nice. Very nice. What do you make?

Now look here!

Oh, come on!

Well, I make around 18 thousand a year. But I don't carry more than $40 at a time. In case you're a hold up man... haha

Where do you live? Oh look, I'm not trying to rob you. I'm not going to kidnap your parokeets, your cats, or your daughters.

I live between lexington and third avenue on seventy fourth street

That wasn't so hard, was it?

I didn't mean to seem so uh... it's just that you don't really carry on a conversation, you just ask question. and I'm usually a reticent. Why do you just stand there?

I'll start walking around in a little bit, and eventually I'll sit down. Wait until you see the expression on his face.

What, whose face? Look here, is this something about the zoo?

The what?

The zoo? Something about the zoo?

The zoo?

You've mentioned it several times?

The zoo? Oh yes, the zoo! I was there before I came here, I told you that! Say, what's the dividing line between upper middle-middle class and lower upper middle class?

My dear fellow I-

Don't "my dear fellow" me!

Was I patronizing? I believe I was. I'm sorry, see your question about the classes bewildered me.

And when your bewildered you become patronizing?

I don't express myself too well sometimes. I'm in publishing. Not writing.

So be it, the truth is, I was being patronizing.

Oh, now you needn't say that.

All right, who are your favorite writers? Baudelaire and JP Marquand?

Well... I like a many great deal of writers, but I have a certain catholicity of taste. Baudelaire is by far the finer of the two, but Marquand has a certain place in our uhh.... National..

Skip it.

I... Sorry.

Do you know what I did before I went to the zoo today? I walked all the way up fifth avenue from washington square. All the way.

Oh, you live in the village!

No, I don't. I took the subway down to the village so I could walk all the way up fifth avenue to the zoo. It's one of those many things a person has to do. Sometimes you have to go a long distance out of your way in order to go a short distance correctly