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10 Cards in this Set

  • Front
  • Back

Landlady: love the trousers, who'd have thought they'd come back in. Only joking live, very natty them

(enter)


The queen of tittle tattle.

Landlady: sod off

Out of the cellar and into the boxing ring, that's me

Landlady: ting ting, tills away, round bleedin' one

Will you back off for once?

Landlady: never.

Same again Jack? (put glass up to optics)

Landlady: Just the one pet, sure

What's up with you tonight?

Landlady: I think you know.

(give drink, take money) Ta mate

Landlady: thanks love

I don't know what you're on about

Landlady: ting ting round two, yes you do, yes you do

Run a pub.

Landlady: that's it, turn to the ropes when you get too close

Landlord: what the bloody hell's this coming in?

Landlady: ting ting, match postponed

It's a stag party. Man the pumps, pull out the stops, raise the prices, come on lets polish them off. You take the spirits, i'll take beers.


Well then gents, whats it to be? (listen to orders, nodding as you do)


Five pints of lager, three bitter, two whiskeys one with ice, one without, gin, gin, gin and tonic, treble tequila, guinness spritzer, brown and bitter, barbican, budweiser, bloody mary, black velvet and a becks, triple X, tiopepe, martini, vodka and shandy and a brandy, pernod, peanuts, crisps, crisps, crisps, crisps, crisps crisps crisps, two rum and okey cokey colas? And and a cherry B and cider for the groom. We'll sort that for you lads, wont we dear? Dear? Dear! (hit bar, exit)