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24 Cards in this Set
- Front
- Back
Intimacy
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*A state achieved via intellectual, emotional, and/or physical closeness as well as via shared activities
-Sharing of self -social, organizational, romantic -proximity plays a role |
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Self-disclosure
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*The process of deliberately revealing information about oneself that is significant and that would not normally be known by others
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Defensiveness
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*The attempt to protect a presenting image a person believes is being attacked
-most predictable reaction to a hostile or indifferent message -protecting yourself from an attack-your presenting self and face -ex. someone criticizes you for making a stupid mistake, or someone calls you self-centered or lazy -sometimes personal -to be an effective communicator, the sender should be sending "positive face support" |
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Benevolent Lies
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*A lie that is not considered malicious by the person who tells it
-may be helpful to the person to whom they are told -told to avoid hurting someone you care for |
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Climate (communication climate)
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*The emotional tone of a relationship between two or more individuals
-positive and negative -if we stop thinking, we are drawn into the negatives (ex. Holocaust-prejudices) |
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Conflict
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*An expressed struggle between at least two interdependent people who perceive incompatible goals, scarce rewards, and interference from the other person in achieving her or his goals
-competition -incompatible goals-also relates to competing; matters of perception-our perceptions can be misjudged -scarce resources-not enough of something to go around-again involves perceptions -Interdependence-one decision affects another-"we are all in this together"; satisfaction of the other depends on the actions of another -Inevitability-conflicts are bound to happen, they occur in all relationships and are impossible to avoid -conflict resolution: you will never truly resolve ALL conflicts-working on conflict management is the solution |
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Functional Conflict
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*Beneficial conflict characterized by communication that is respectful, cooperative, and focused, which results in the resolution of a problem and the strengthening of a relationship
-relationships can grow by solving the problem and often improving other areas of interaction -achieve the best possible outcome -a functional conflict is the result of the style of communication and method of resolution |
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Win-Win Strategy
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*An approach to conflict resolution in which people work together to satisfy all their goals
-high degree of concern for both -ultimately still a win-win -collaboration |
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Dysfunctional Conflict
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*Harmful conflict characterized by communication that is coercive, uncooperative, and unfocused, which often results in a win-lose outcome and a damaged relationship
-can be harmful, causing pain and weakening of a relationship -outcomes fall short of what is possible -have a damaging effect on the relationship |
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Confirming Communication
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*A message that expresses caring or respect for another person; the person is valued by the speaker
-showing that you value them-they are important to you -acknowledge individuality and accept the individuality |
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Lose-Lose Strategy
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*Avoidance: A lose-lose conflict style in which people non-assertively ignore or stay away from conflict
*Compromise: A conflict style in which both people get only part of what they want because they sacrifice some of their goals |
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Win-Lose Strategy
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*Competition: A win-lose conflict style in which one person wins at the other person's expense
-I am going to win and your going to lose -can include spirals-a staircase that starts with something little/trivial but if the conflict is not managed, it increases in terms of conflict -can get to the point: I'm going to make you lose, even if I don't win -Ultimately-almost inevitably becomes lose-lose |
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Avoidance
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*A lose-lose conflict style in which people non-assertively ignore or stay away from conflict
-can be physical (sterring clear of a friend after having an argument) -can be conversational (changing the topic, joking, or denying that a problem exists) -reflects a pessimistic attitude about conflict -believe there is no good way to resolve the issue -can keep the peace temporarily but it typically leads to unsatisfying relationships |
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Disconfirming Communication
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*A message that expresses a lack of caring or respect for another person; the person is not valued by the speaker
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Compromise
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A conflict style in which both people get only part of what they want because they sacrifice some of their goals
-you both get some of what you want but both sacrifice some too -ultimately a lose-lose -partial satisfaction may seem best -usually a negotiated lose-lose |
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Dialectics (dialectical tensions)
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*Relational tensions that arise when two opposing or incompatible forces exist simultaneously
-have high impacts on relationships -both internal and external -we are not similar-we have different opinions and attitudes -ex. when your in a relationship and need your own space/time -message-self talk- have to deal with the dialectic and be rational -can't change the other person's dialect, we have to understand them and work with them |
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Bonding
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*A stage of relational development in which the partners make symbolic public gestures to show that their relationship exists
-making it public -ex. kissing, engagement ring, wedding |
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Initiating
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*The first stage in relational development, in which the interactants express interest in one another
-interested in making contact and to demonstrate that you are a person worth talking to -usually brief communication-handshakes, remarks about innocuous subjects(weather), and friendly expressions -way of signaling that you're interested in building some kind of relationship -can be difficult for people who are shy |
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Relational Maintenance
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*Communication aimed at keeping relationships operating smoothly and satisfactorily (e.g., behaving in a positive way, being open, and assuring your partner that you're committed to the relationship).
-it is hard work -trust must be maintained -relationship must be valued (they are the most important in life) -All relationship require it-social, organizational, romantic -what do I have to do to keep this relationship going? -proximity plays a role |
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Empathy
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*The ability to project oneself into another person's point of view in an attempt to experience the other's thoughts and feelings
-do we understand where the other person is coming from -can be both positive and negative |
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Impervious Responses
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*A disconfirming response that ignores another person's attempt to communicate
-can be verbal or nonverbal -ex. failing to return a phone call -can be face-to-face as well -silent-treatment -being ignored by a significant other can be psychologically damaging |
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Direct Aggression
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*An expression of the sender's thoughts and/or feelings that attacks the position and dignity of the receiver
-attacking the other person -lashing out to attack the source of the displeasure -nine types: characters attacks, competence attacks, physical appearance attacks, maledictions(wishing the other bad fortune), teasing, ridicule, threats, swearing, and nonverbal emblems(fist shaking, waving arms) -both verbal and nonverbal -can have a severe impact on the target -significant connection with verbal aggression and physical aggression -psychological effects can be harmful -recipients can feel embarrassed, inadequate, humiliated, hopeless, or depressed -can damage the entire relationship |
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Passive Aggression
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*An indirect expression of aggression, delivered in a way that allows the sender to maintain a facade of kindness
-punishes the person without direct confrontation -"crazymaking" tactics-guilt, agrees but has a different agenda, sarcasm -ex. not answering the phone when your upset with someone-avoiding -can be nonverbal-sigh, expressions, disdainful laugh |
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Escalatory Spirals
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*A reciprocal communication pattern in which one person's attack leads to a counterattack by the other, with the level of hostility steadily increasing
-like a staircase -stars with something little/trivial but if the conflict is not managed, it increases in terms of conflict |