Ever since I was little I always wondered why I was never good enough for anything. I felt like I was not good enough for my family, and I still believe this to this day. My family treats me so different than they do to anyone else. I know I was never good enough in school because no one ever wanted me in their class. I strived for straight “A”s and sometimes that just was not enough. I wanted all the extra credit and higher grades than anyone. I made it a mission to do everything that I could do to make it in life. I learned at a young age that I was on my own. I defended me since no one else would. I still got to defend for myself even now because I got no one. I know I seem like I know everything and that I got everything under control but
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I understand I do not have it as hard as a lot of people in the world, but to me it is tough and is only getting tougher. Life is really tough and I understand that, but what I do not understand is why I do everything I can do and still fail. I believe in myself and stay positive but lately it is not getting me anywhere. I cannot give up even when the tough gets going I just got to continue and press on even …show more content…
I am thankful for what God has blessed me because everything could be worse. I make sure to thank him and the few friends I have every day because no one knows when it is their last day on earth.
Throughout my whole life I never knew if I was going to live or die. Some days I would wake up as a kid and wonder what my purpose in life was. Why I am here is the question that I always ask myself. Everyday I fear for my life. I make people think I am strong, independent, and confident, but in all reality I am terrified, suicidal, and lost. I have never truly had a home, family, friends, or a life in general. Everything I have ever had has been taken away from me. Everything that I had ever known usually ends up in a lie. Everyday since the day I was born I was neglected. My brother and sisters never wanted me to be born, and my brother even asked if I had a return button. My dad wanted my mom to have an abortion because he found out I was a girl and he did not want a little girl after his perfect little boy was already born. He abused me but no one ever believed me even as my mother watched day by day she never did anything. I started kindergarten in August of 2000.
I understand I do not have it as hard as a lot of people in the world, but to me it is tough and is only getting tougher. Life is really tough and I understand that, but what I do not understand is why I do everything I can do and still fail. I believe in myself and stay positive but lately it is not getting me anywhere. I cannot give up even when the tough gets going I just got to continue and press on even …show more content…
I am thankful for what God has blessed me because everything could be worse. I make sure to thank him and the few friends I have every day because no one knows when it is their last day on earth.
Throughout my whole life I never knew if I was going to live or die. Some days I would wake up as a kid and wonder what my purpose in life was. Why I am here is the question that I always ask myself. Everyday I fear for my life. I make people think I am strong, independent, and confident, but in all reality I am terrified, suicidal, and lost. I have never truly had a home, family, friends, or a life in general. Everything I have ever had has been taken away from me. Everything that I had ever known usually ends up in a lie. Everyday since the day I was born I was neglected. My brother and sisters never wanted me to be born, and my brother even asked if I had a return button. My dad wanted my mom to have an abortion because he found out I was a girl and he did not want a little girl after his perfect little boy was already born. He abused me but no one ever believed me even as my mother watched day by day she never did anything. I started kindergarten in August of 2000.