Personal Narrative: Why Does He Not Listen

Why Does He Not Listen?

I’ve been knowing him my whole life and you would still think that he would at least try to understand me by just listening. A person with a fixed mindset is always trying to see things their own way. They are set up a certain way that when you try to communicate with them and explain your point of view, they become very biased in terms of understanding your point of view as opposed to theirs. This is a great definition of my dad. When I try talking to him I feel as though my thoughts are not being heard. My dad has this mindset that I should put all of my energy into academics and make graduating from school my number one priority. Under normal circumstances this would be the norm in terms of expectations …show more content…
Persuasive discourse is “ Arguments offered to persuade others to stop interfering so that you can fulfill your desires” (p.230) My father is always being “ persuasive”(p.230) for example, When I’m talking to him and I try to explain how I am getting older and I need to have more freedom like go out with my friends or go out to eat , he won 't let me finish and he would constantly tells me that he didn 't finish college because he always wanted to be with his friends doing something that isn 't studying. Then after while he would ask me if I want that for my life, and I would start thinking and then decide not to go out and stay home and read a book or something that has to do with school. This is an example of my dad using “ persuasive discourse” because he would persuade me in a way that he would get into my head and he would get me to do what he want. Do to his persuasion to control my wants, we have many “ behavioral conflicts” (p.231). Behavioral conflicts is “ Disagreements over specific, concrete behaviors that one performs or fail to perform”(p.231) We start arguing and I get really upset since I don’t have freedom. For instance, when I tell him that my friend invited me to a baby shower and I want to go, he would tell me that I can’t go and he would make an excuse so I don’t go like he would tell me that I need to clean the …show more content…
I just want him to listen to what I want and to understand that I’m being hurt by his “unintentional message”(p.211). Unintentional message is “ Messages that are not intended to hurt the recipient” (p.211) Sometimes he tells me that I’m not going to become someone in life because I am always on my phone, that the phone is distracting me too much. Sometimes he even tells me that the reason why I fail a test or an exam is because I’m getting stupid. It hurt when he say it, but I have the feeling that he don’t mean it like that, I believe that the problem is that he don’t know how to communicate with me. He wants to push me too hard that our relationship is “passing away”(p.190). Passing away is “ The process by which relationships decline over time”(p.190) for example, I use to communicate with him by telling him my problems and when I needed help with a situation, but since I turned 15 years old our communication has declined. Now when we have a conversation he 's the only one that talk because he doesn 't let me express how I feel or what I think about what he 's saying. Now our relationship is not the same , now I don’t want to tell him what or how I feel. For example, I was abused by my grandmother husband, and I was scared to tell him what was going on , because our relationship is not the same anymore. My father would ask me what was wrong but I was too scared to tell him, I was using