Why Do We Cause Conflict?

When we examine our goals and criticisms through TRIP we are better able to understand what the conflict is about and ways in which we can prevent or deal with conflict. While some conflict are easily grounded in one or more of the TRIP goals any of these goals can have an underlining identity issue that could be causing the conflict. As we observe our own identity issues we are able to better show and vocally express appreciation for others thus confirming their own identity. Before any form of appreciation can be shown to others we must first find what causes conflicts in our own life and find what is truly at the heart of the conflict. When I took a few moments to really think about what sort of things inspire conflict in my life I came up with: money (particularity how …show more content…
While this issue is related to topic when I look at this conflict as an issue that relates to identity I think it might have to do with the thought if I have more money I believe I am seen as someone who is more responsible and respectable. When I complain about spending money and instead saving it I am showing that I am thinking ahead for the future and will have the resources to support myself. For my conflict related to cleanliness, this issue is related to topic and is heavily influenced by my OCD tendencies. If I relate cleanliness to identity I believe I think that the cleaner my living space is the better a person will think of me. By having a clean space, others will see me in a better light and in turn will form a better impressions of me. The final conflict I have with others is when people use a patronizing tone with me and this conflict is grounded in relational and identity goals. It would be relational because “relational goals define how each party wants to be treated by the other party” (Hocker and Wilmot 77) and identity goals “include a specific