Why Are People Attracted To Relationships

Great Essays
Aleksandra Tyzkiewicz
Social Psychology
9.08.2015

INTRODUCTION

Many people have been strongly attracted to someone, maybe even in love. The main problem is that these two are separated by a very thin line, as a matter of fact many people confuse attraction with love. These people believe that the feelings they have for the other person are so strong that they passed the attraction phase and walked into what is so called “love”. These feelings usually lead to relationships and this is what psychologists have been trying to explain; they say that a relationship is characterized by “love, care, commitment and intimacy” and only then it can be classified as consummate love, which means that all of these characteristics are present. This paper
…show more content…
For many people it is difficult to engage in a relationship or even to be attracted to someone because of their self-esteem. Even if they are attracted they will never have the courage to tell the other person that they are, if their self-esteem is low. People with a low self-esteem are usually more inclined to be on the defensive side, for them it is difficult to create a relationship simply because they are afraid of rejection (this is one of the characteristics of the avoidant type). On the contrary people who engage in a relationship should be able to open up, to reveal their past and their history, and for people with low self-esteem this becomes a problem, they have a low opinion of themselves therefore they think that no one will be able to accept their past or their. Another surprising thing which can be confirmed by Dion & Dion study is that people with a high self-esteem are also prone to have less relationship, maybe just because they are so secure about themselves and about who they are that they intimidate other people in the approach to them. They tend to block people out, they do so with no intention however their attitude toward themselves scares people away. The self-esteem factor leads directly to the emotional status of a person, and whether they are perceived as available or …show more content…
(2009). Does a long-term relationship kill romantic love? Review of General Psychology, 59-65.

Dion, K. L., & Dion, K. K. (1991). Psychological individualism and romantic love. Journal of Social Behavior and Personality, 6, 17–33.

Hatfield, E., & Sprecher, S. (1986). Mirror, mirror: The importance of looks in everyday life. Albany: State University of New York Press.

Hendrick, C., & Hendrick, S. S. (1986). A theory and method of love. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 50, 392-402.

Lockwood, P., Dolderman, D., Sadler, P., & Gerchak, E. (2004). Feeling better about doing worse: Social comparisons within romantic relationships. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 87(1), 80–95.

Marcassa, S. (2013). Divorce laws and divorce rate in the US. The B.E. Journal of Macroeconomics.

Saylor Foundation. (2014). Introduction to psychology. Retrieved on August 3, 2015 from http://www.saylor.org/books

Sternberg, R. (1986). Triangular Theory of Love. Psychological Review, 96(2),

Related Documents

  • Improved Essays

    They reasoned that the same three attachment styles identified in children might exist in adolescence and adulthood and have important implications for the formation of romantic relationships (Levy & Blatt 1999). Random samples were asked to respond to questions related to their “most important”…

    • 652 Words
    • 3 Pages
    Improved Essays
  • Improved Essays

    The Love Gottman Summary

    • 766 Words
    • 4 Pages

    Growing up in a very traditional home you tend to adapt to your surroundings of the love that is provided there. The author of this article grew up admiring the love her parents had for each other. She would ask over and over again how they met in a small town in Mexico, yet make it hundreds of miles to Phoenix to once again cross paths. Since the moment they met, they have had a very strong connection, but somewhere along the years they began to drift apart. Where did it go wrong?…

    • 766 Words
    • 4 Pages
    Improved Essays
  • Improved Essays

    On the other hand, Mandy’s presentation explicates on a study she tried in finding her love match. Her performance was intriguing and interesting to watch. The assumptions that Mandy made about her audience was that she assumed that her audience were familiar with her article she published on New York Times, To Fall in Love With Anyone, Do This. She published this article in January and got way over 2 million views.…

    • 755 Words
    • 4 Pages
    Improved Essays
  • Decent Essays

    This article talks about rates of loneliness, and depression in American, it talks about how love work biologically, oxytocin, and neurons and vagal tone. The article explains the differences in theoretical, practical, and scientific definitions of love. This…

    • 329 Words
    • 2 Pages
    Decent Essays
  • Improved Essays

    Humans have always looked for the answer to finding happiness in life. For the majority of people, they believe that love will bring them this sense of happiness. In Barbara Fredrickson’s, “Selections from Love 2.0: How Our Supreme Emotion Affects Everything We Feel, Think, Do and Become,” she talks about how we see love in the wrong way and that we should start looking at love the way the body sees it. This change in perception of the definition of love allows people to have a better chance of obtaining love and having a better sense of self. With the conventional notions of love and relationships, love becomes more complex by giving people the sense of longing.…

    • 1475 Words
    • 6 Pages
    Improved Essays
  • Improved Essays

    “Love” Has so many meaning nowadays, we use the word love to express our emotions in the deepest ways. In couples today “Love” is a very fragile, yet powerful word. Relationships seem to be all based on love, without the relationships do not survive. What hold relationships together is certain aspects and perspectives on selecting a partner in life, that s described through the mate-selection theories. In the movie crazy stupid love, a lot of relationships are displayed and many forms of theories are displayed throughout.…

    • 777 Words
    • 4 Pages
    Improved Essays
  • Improved Essays

    Barbara Frederickson's take on love is truly compelling. Rather than summarizing love in the cliche-like fashion that Americans have grown accustomed to, Frederickson takes an entirely new spin on love and its relation to the human biology. There are no loose statements; each idea has a specific set of reasons for being introduced into the passage as well as experimental evidence to emphasize that the ideas are not hypothetical, but proven. Frederickson's findings could serve to be invaluable in the world today. With all of the distractions that people are exposed to during every minute of every day; sometimes the most essential things in life, are not given the required amount of attention.…

    • 1992 Words
    • 8 Pages
    Improved Essays
  • Improved Essays

    In what way are the book 's topics [as you identified them] relevant to this course? “Hold me Tight” is a book written by Dr. Sue Johnson, who discusses the true understanding of love and how to repair it when people lose connection. Johnson separates the book into three parts that discusses more in depth about the discoveries she makes about love through her research and studies. Both the book and the course discusses , what love truly is and how attachment is our primary motivation in life. That when we become disconnected from our partner, tension in the relationship builds up and increases the risk of married couples to divorce.…

    • 1265 Words
    • 6 Pages
    Improved Essays
  • Decent Essays

    Erikson Early Adulthood

    • 113 Words
    • 1 Pages

    In contemporary society, many people see the search and formation of personal relationships in younger generations (e.g. adolescent and young adults). It is something we see very often in our daily lives and in the media (e.g. news, movies, books). Even under Erikson’s stages of psychosocial development, the stage of intimacy v. isolation is within early adulthood (20-39 years). With this emphasis placed on this demographic, the experiences of other and older demographics are often neglected. It is something not many of us pay attention to.…

    • 113 Words
    • 1 Pages
    Decent Essays
  • Great Essays

    Levine, Risen and Arthof in section two of the text, discussed issues related to sexual intimacy its hope and disappointments. In chapter three of the text, Levine explored the themes of love, intimacy and sexual desire and provided an in depth look as to what they meant to patients. Sexual love is described as “interlocking ideas” consistent of nine aspects namely: love as being a grand, idealized, culturally reinforced ambition; love as the label for the arrangement that people make with each other; love as giving birth to a tenacious bond; love as a moral commitment; love as a self-management process; love as a force in nature that has its way with us throughout the life cycle; love as an ever changing pattern of emotions experienced with…

    • 1337 Words
    • 6 Pages
    Great Essays
  • Superior Essays

    The new definition of Love, introduced by Barbara Fredrickson, in “Love 2.0,” not only presents the scientific analyzes of the brain’s response to positive connections, but also a unique perspective of what love actually is. The unfamiliar standpoint about how love is “forever renewable” (108) and how “[it is] not unconditional” (108) refines how love is interpreted and perceived. Fredrickson presents an ongoing juxtaposition from both ends of love and strongly states that “love is a single act performed by two brains,” (113). It is true that micro-moments of love lead to good health, but love relationships and long-term health in light of this micro moment emphasis – especially – are never constant and are always changing; simply because one…

    • 1784 Words
    • 8 Pages
    Superior Essays
  • Improved Essays

    While there are examples where using a conflict’s interpretation is more accurate, romantic love can be generally looked at with more accuracy using a functionalist’s…

    • 633 Words
    • 3 Pages
    Improved Essays
  • Improved Essays

    Love Of Your Life

    • 1394 Words
    • 6 Pages

    Choosing a mate is life’s single most important challenge, says Dr. Neil Warren on page two of his book, “Finding The Love of Your Life.” In the 161 following pages, Dr. Warren explains through ten principles why the selection of a spouse is of utmost important. These critical principles were formulated based upon his experiences as a psychologist. He found that the search for a future spouse is often thought of lightly, but this pursuit is not a matter of luck, nor should it be done in jest. Dr. Warren believes that there are skills involved in selecting a spouse and that once these skills are developed by the application of his ten principles, the divorce rate can decrease.…

    • 1394 Words
    • 6 Pages
    Improved Essays
  • Improved Essays

    Empty Love Analysis

    • 778 Words
    • 4 Pages

    What is love, and how men and women define it? For centuries now people have talked about love so much, but what is this thing called love. Well love is an assortment of diverse emotions, states, and mentalities that ranges from interpersonal love to joy. It can allude to a feeling of a solid fascination and individual attachment.…

    • 778 Words
    • 4 Pages
    Improved Essays
  • Improved Essays

    College courses offer a wide variety of topics and classes students can choose from with only some being mandatory. One can find almost anything they are interested in to learn more about, but the one class every college student should have to take is a psychology class that works with relationships. Instituting a curriculum that benefits the students in the aspect of relationships could drastically change the divorce rates of couples in the United States. In a human’s life, relationships play a major role, but according to American Psychological Association about 40 to 50 percent of married couples in the United States divorce. The divorce rate in subsequent marriages is even higher.…

    • 1589 Words
    • 7 Pages
    Improved Essays