Here's What Would Happen By Cheryl Richardon Analysis

We all have those thoughts that leave us wondering what the hell is going on in our minds. Those thoughts often leave us pondering whether or not we are good people or deserve the life we are living. The less desirable thoughts that we all have are emotionally and physically draining whether we know it or not. That is what is discussed in Cheryl Richardon’s “Here’s what would happen if you were aware of your thoughts on a daily basis”. The idea is to balance the negative with the positive and not allow the negatives to control our lives. It comes to the point of choosing whether to shift our thoughts from the negative to the positive. That’s when we can ultimately change the course of our lives and the actions we take. Being able to know what …show more content…
One set of thoughts that constantly plague my subconscious are the “What ifs”. Growing up I was bullied constantly leaving me in an incredibly vulnerable state. This is where I believe the basis of these negative thoughts came from. Not only was it the negative comments that others made to me or about me, but the way I perceived myself after hearing these things that were said about me. The constant fear of judgement ultimately left me in a state of panic, therefore leading to my own negative thoughts towards myself. The constant thoughts of “What if… I didn’t exist” constantly haunted me. I was so concerned with ensuring no one knew the things that haunted me. I would stay to myself to keep the negative thoughts away for as long as possible. Then came the first suicide attempt. I was a freshman in high school, the bullying left me so broken down mentally that I let the “what if?” thoughts consume me. The negative thoughts that plagued my mind took over. The words and comments filled my head with these thoughts. I tried to maintain the happy go lucky persona that I put on for the world even today, but was not successful. I worked so hard to ensure that those thoughts weren’t presented to my family and friends or like Richardon says “the flashing thought meter on our …show more content…
I’ve been in a relationship with my current boyfriend for over the last year. Like Cheryl uses as an example in her article about relationships, this is exactly the type of thing that plagues my mind. Worry is something that’s always on my subconscious, even if I’m not all too worried about it. My current relationship wasn’t always as good as it is now. We have gone through hell to get to where we are now. He cheated on me with his ex-girlfriend and then lied to me about it. When I finally confronted him regarding it, he chose her over me and that was the end. After working through it and remaining best friends we got back together. However even now I have these thoughts that lead to constant worry. I find myself often sitting there looking at him and picturing him with her. I find myself dreaming that he ups and leaves me for her and goes back to everything he told me he would never allow to happen again. I sit and ponder the worries that face me. Is it my inability to trust that causes these worries or is it his actions in the past? One should not have these worries that constantly return every time something seems a little off in a relationship. Even though I have gone through all of this, I find myself still questioning my relationship and whether or not it’s healthy for me to be in. The constant fear of the past is what leads to my negative thoughts today. I try and take action and alleviate the