Humorous Wedding Speech By A Student

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Good evening my fellow classmates, parents, guardians, and teachers. Welcome to Delphi’s graduation for the best graduating class in the world, today, right now, June 29th, 2016.
Thank you for the honour of being named your valedictorian. I am very grateful and excited to be here, (but if this goes poorly, remember, I nominated Riley. If this goes well, I will certainly do speeches for your birthdays, baptisms, family reunions, all those shindigs. Just call me over and we can work out pricing later.)
When people ask what school I go to, I say Delphi. Proudly, like they know what I’m talking about. But in most cases people tend to look at me and say, “I never heard of that school before. Is it outside Toronto? Is it a private school?”
I
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So then I mention spares and their eyes light up like I’m taking about a magical place like Narnia. Then another word catches their attention. Alternative. Al-turn-a-tive.
“What is alternative?” They ask. Independent study based, small class sizes, calling their teachers by first name, and using the PA only when necessary rather than taking up the first 20 minutes of the day and SPARES! You know, alternative.
But you know what? Delphi isn’t about spares. Delphi is about nurturing scholarship and personal growth, the true purpose of these spares. We are learning skills for the rest our lives.
In grade 9, Costa solved a 5 by 5 rubrics cube. Something I will never accomplish. He told us there are secrets to solving it, and if we don’t know these secrets we won’t be successful. Like solving a rubics cube, working at Delphi was about figuring out the ‘secrets’, the codes and conventions of successful studentship. We were taught skills and lessons that would help us move forward on our own. Lessons are everywhere and here at Delphi we have learned more than any other time in our life. It’s not the facts we will remember, it’s the lessons. We weren’t told how to live life, just as Costa didn’t tell us how to solve the rubrics cube. Along the way we have found that there are many different end results, and although not perfect, being happy is one thing that truly
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I haven’t talked to her much until this year, but she is someone that I admire. She is there for those who need her help, and listens when you have a story to tell. She is quiet, and sweet, and she is worth talking to.
Heather was one of the first staff I met here at Delphi. I had my interview for Delphi with her. I remember that day. I was sick. She said I was organized. She gave me an acceptance and I was pretty excited. When thinking about Heather, I will remember her Halloween costumes. They were definitely my favourite. One year she was EQAO, the next she was a realistic looking werewolf, and most recently, when she was pregnant, she had baby arms stick out of her stomach holding a trick or treat bag. So nurturing!
Last, but certainly not least we have Deb. I have taken all except one Deb courses offered for me, so I feel really close to Deb. There was one year I had 15 hours a week of classes with her in one semester. Still, I could never get tired of her, and would take classes with her for the rest of my life if I could. Deb is definitely a role model for most of us. She spends all her time with students, and always has her doors open if she isn’t teaching class. Despite being a mother to all her students, she isn’t afraid to give us critique because she wants us to improve. She is still not an easy marker, but she shows that hard work pays off. I feel that I have learned the most from finishing the assignments she

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