“Well, right now I'm not dead. But when I am, it's like…I don't know, I guess it's like being inside a book that nobody's reading. A book? An old one. It's up on a library shelf, so you're safe and everything, but the book hasn't been checked out for a long, long time. All you can do is wait. Just hope somebody will pick it up and start reading.”
“He was a slim, dead, almost …show more content…
The soldiers that survived the war came home and were rejected from people. They could not come home and share stories about the war, so they all had to keep their memories to themselves. I believe that is why he compared himself to an old book, because until he wrote his books, he didn't tell his stories. When he finally wrote his books, he let out all these stories, like he was letting someone read him. In this quote, he says that he is not dead, but I understand that he feels like he is dead.
In the second quote, O’Brien describes a boy he killed during the war. The boy was walking along a trail when O’Brien saw him and threw a grenade at him. When O'Brian realized that he was going to die he tried to tell himself that the only reason he threw the grenade was to scare away the soldier.
“He was a slim, dead, almost dainty young man of about twenty. He lay with one leg bent beneath him, his jaw in his throat, his face neither expressive nor inexpressive. One eye was shut. The other was a star-shaped …show more content…
He says that it feels like you’re not human anymore, like you are slipping out of your skin.
“Together we understood what terror was: you're not human anymore. You're a shadow. You slip out of your own skin, like molting; shedding your own history and your own future, leaving behind everything you ever were or wanted to believe in. You know you're about to die. And it's not a movie and you aren't a hero and all you can do is whimper and wait.”
O’Brien personally experienced this terror, and so he must have felt not human anymore. I believe he never felt thoroughly “normal” again until a while after the war. He sort of totally gave up at that moment. In this quote he perfectly captivates what everyone would feel when they are in utter terror. He says that in real life, you will not be a hero, all you will do is whimper, and wait for someone else to be a