1. Is there a clearly stated thesis in the introductory paragraph?
The thesis sentence includes the writer’s opinion of whether the writer disagrees or agrees with the argument of Gladwell. But I think the writer needs to write three reasons for supporting the opinion in the thesis sentence.
2. Do all the supporting paragraphs back up the thesis?
The writers wrote three paragraphs for supporting the thesis sentence. So I was able to easily read and understand the each paragraph. However, I think the first sentence of the first paragraph needs more detail about why the writer disagrees with the idea of surveillance.
Comment : Overall, I was able to easily read this essay because the essay is obviously separated into 5 paragraphs, and each …show more content…
However, this essay needs more evidence overall. The writer may add examples of writer’s experiences or ongoing situation in this society. Also, she needs at least two more citations for effectively finishing this argumentative essay.
Base3
1.Is there a clear method of organization? (List of items or a time order?)
I could realize that this essay clearly separates paragraphs into 5 paragraphs: Introduction, three body paragraphs, conclusion. However, it was difficult to know the main topic sentence of each paragraph.
2.Are transitions used to connect sentences and ideas?
She used diverse transitions such as “Furthermore,” and “Despite the fact that,” for informing about next contents. I could predict that the following is her additional opinion or opposite information.
Comment: Each paragraph does each role in the essay. First paragraph does as the introduction, and following three paragraphs do as body detailed paragraphs with examples. However, I could not easily know main topics of each body paragraphs. I think the writer needs to make clear the main topics of each paragraph for supporting her thesis
The thesis sentence includes the writer’s opinion of whether the writer disagrees or agrees with the argument of Gladwell. But I think the writer needs to write three reasons for supporting the opinion in the thesis sentence.
2. Do all the supporting paragraphs back up the thesis?
The writers wrote three paragraphs for supporting the thesis sentence. So I was able to easily read and understand the each paragraph. However, I think the first sentence of the first paragraph needs more detail about why the writer disagrees with the idea of surveillance.
Comment : Overall, I was able to easily read this essay because the essay is obviously separated into 5 paragraphs, and each …show more content…
However, this essay needs more evidence overall. The writer may add examples of writer’s experiences or ongoing situation in this society. Also, she needs at least two more citations for effectively finishing this argumentative essay.
Base3
1.Is there a clear method of organization? (List of items or a time order?)
I could realize that this essay clearly separates paragraphs into 5 paragraphs: Introduction, three body paragraphs, conclusion. However, it was difficult to know the main topic sentence of each paragraph.
2.Are transitions used to connect sentences and ideas?
She used diverse transitions such as “Furthermore,” and “Despite the fact that,” for informing about next contents. I could predict that the following is her additional opinion or opposite information.
Comment: Each paragraph does each role in the essay. First paragraph does as the introduction, and following three paragraphs do as body detailed paragraphs with examples. However, I could not easily know main topics of each body paragraphs. I think the writer needs to make clear the main topics of each paragraph for supporting her thesis