Two thousand and fourteen was the worst year of my life. Nobody close to my heart had ever died. At four years old, I went into a church ,but didn’t know why I was there. My mom dressed me all up in my Sunday’s best, but it wasn’t Sunday. I watched my grandma fall to her knees and carried out the back. I really didn’t understand death ,nor really knew why my grandma was so hurt and crying. Death was something so unfamiliar to me.
Squeezing into the pew of packed church, I looked around and saw my stepdad’s family. Some of them weighed down by loss, drowning in their tears, but some were just relieved seeing family they haven’t seen in forever. The service commenced and I felt nothing but loss. The tears formed a knot in my throat until …show more content…
I knew exactly what she meant. I smothered myself into her embrace. Granny had also passed away.
I wasn’t myself. My bathtub drowned in my tears. My pillow never dried. I went from rarely crying into crying every morning, noon, and night. The pang of their memories hit me every minute of the day. The funerals were worse. How can I make this hurt go away? I went on for months with their memories clouding my thoughts. I remembered that I had this picture of prayer references in my phone. I found the best one to fit my situation and read it. Then I realized the one solution I never tried. Prayer. Every night I prayed for the hurt to go away. And one night, I didn’t cry myself to sleep. I finally felt free.
I remind myself every night to pray. I put up a picture of Granny and Sugamama in my room to remind myself of the good times. Some will never understand how something so tragic could strength and start a beautiful relationship with God but God put me in place where I had no one to turn to but him. So when I start to face problems I talk to God about it first. I finally put my trust into God and he handled it. I listen to this one song called Drown by Chance the Rapper and it reminds me so much of that situation and makes me cherish our bond even more and always remember that God is forever one step
Squeezing into the pew of packed church, I looked around and saw my stepdad’s family. Some of them weighed down by loss, drowning in their tears, but some were just relieved seeing family they haven’t seen in forever. The service commenced and I felt nothing but loss. The tears formed a knot in my throat until …show more content…
I knew exactly what she meant. I smothered myself into her embrace. Granny had also passed away.
I wasn’t myself. My bathtub drowned in my tears. My pillow never dried. I went from rarely crying into crying every morning, noon, and night. The pang of their memories hit me every minute of the day. The funerals were worse. How can I make this hurt go away? I went on for months with their memories clouding my thoughts. I remembered that I had this picture of prayer references in my phone. I found the best one to fit my situation and read it. Then I realized the one solution I never tried. Prayer. Every night I prayed for the hurt to go away. And one night, I didn’t cry myself to sleep. I finally felt free.
I remind myself every night to pray. I put up a picture of Granny and Sugamama in my room to remind myself of the good times. Some will never understand how something so tragic could strength and start a beautiful relationship with God but God put me in place where I had no one to turn to but him. So when I start to face problems I talk to God about it first. I finally put my trust into God and he handled it. I listen to this one song called Drown by Chance the Rapper and it reminds me so much of that situation and makes me cherish our bond even more and always remember that God is forever one step