I killed a couple of boys. Their souls of course. And like serial killers I felt no remorse nor pain. It was like a kid wide-eyed on his tip toes trying to reach for a cookie from the cookie jar. That was me, the cookie jar, hard to reach, emotionally. It was a lifestyle that I gave myself, right after my former ex-boyfriend killed himself. I felt guilty for not stopping him, and it became an obstacle in my life that did not let me move on.
Now, these boys deserved what they got because it happened to me but worse. Worse because it happened to me, and I was anathematized. Alexis had imprecated me with not loving anyone, not even my family little less a stranger. After his death, I became a person who prayed on the weaker. I would hurt these …show more content…
Everything that I wasn't, and wanted to be. I had three masks, the one I let my family see, which was a determined girl who wanted to do something with her life. The one I showed my friends, which was this delighted person full of positivity and the third mask, which reflected who I was. Rob saw all three masks, and he held my hand through everything and came somewhat of my therapist. Rob was able to see all the masks, because at some point he went through the same thing, but worse. Worse, because he deluded me, he made me believe he was one of the weaker boys, but instead he was one of the strong souls disguised as a weaker one, waiting for his next prey. He was somewhat like me, but a thousand times worse and a great manipulator. He helped me end my lifestyle, become a better and a stronger person, but then Rob let go. Rob put me back on my knees, but I was madly in love and didn't care about the way he treated me. I knew that I deserved it for all the previous souls I had killed, but I loved it. I loved it because no matter how much he was hurting me both physically and emotionally, I knew that he was going to come around. I was wrong, as he became more dominant over my life, I felt like I was drowning on my own puddle of blood. Everytime he would hit me, It felt like a kiss. Rob, had taken a lonely girl and turned her into a broken one. I was guileless when I had met him, but after all the beatings of both emotional and
Now, these boys deserved what they got because it happened to me but worse. Worse because it happened to me, and I was anathematized. Alexis had imprecated me with not loving anyone, not even my family little less a stranger. After his death, I became a person who prayed on the weaker. I would hurt these …show more content…
Everything that I wasn't, and wanted to be. I had three masks, the one I let my family see, which was a determined girl who wanted to do something with her life. The one I showed my friends, which was this delighted person full of positivity and the third mask, which reflected who I was. Rob saw all three masks, and he held my hand through everything and came somewhat of my therapist. Rob was able to see all the masks, because at some point he went through the same thing, but worse. Worse, because he deluded me, he made me believe he was one of the weaker boys, but instead he was one of the strong souls disguised as a weaker one, waiting for his next prey. He was somewhat like me, but a thousand times worse and a great manipulator. He helped me end my lifestyle, become a better and a stronger person, but then Rob let go. Rob put me back on my knees, but I was madly in love and didn't care about the way he treated me. I knew that I deserved it for all the previous souls I had killed, but I loved it. I loved it because no matter how much he was hurting me both physically and emotionally, I knew that he was going to come around. I was wrong, as he became more dominant over my life, I felt like I was drowning on my own puddle of blood. Everytime he would hit me, It felt like a kiss. Rob, had taken a lonely girl and turned her into a broken one. I was guileless when I had met him, but after all the beatings of both emotional and