Though life is often suggested to be of high complexity and fragility due to the infinite possibilities that come and go quickly, many of us fail to recognize how, sometimes, even the most common everyday conversations reveal how simplistic life may actually be. “Finals are killing me, I’m dying so hard on the inside right now.” or “I live for KPOP because like...Lee Jinki and Victoria Song are literally perfection. ” are examples of phrases that any person would use as a way of self expression. Then there are other ways life is brought up as topics of conversation such as sources of motivation. Phrases that range from “live life to its fullest” to “do something meaningful with your life” seem like mundane words that can be said by anyone.
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From a young age, I have been taught by my mom what it means to be a moral, compassionate, and tolerant person in today’s society. In addition, I am a very religious person and am in complete agreement with the Buddhist views of not harming other sentient beings, having a calm mind to access all situations, and not “judging of a book by it’s cover”. But that doesn’t mean I’ve been able to live my life completely by those standards. A very touchy and personal topic I’ve never really been able to face head-on about is my appearance. Not only now, but ever since I was young, once topics such as beauty, health, and weight appeared, I would be the first one to shy away from the conversation. I remember specifically when I had an argument with my dad and my feelings at that time were shattered, if they could be shattered any more than they already were. I remember the roaring that sounded something like, “You waste your mom’s money on a gym membership that you don’t use! I go to the gym everyday, why are you so lazy?” or “Who likes fat girls? If you ask me, I don’t!” Words hurt a lot more than actions, especially words that come from people who are immediate family. The standards in which I have chosen to live by are constantly challenged when issues like such arise. Keeping calm becomes the last priority and what even is tolerance? It’s almost like all the willpower I have is just thrown out the window without a second thought and immediately, retaliation becomes a natural reflex. Of course, in time, I only grew resentful and uncaring towards such words. Let’s just conclude I didn’t exactly return any nice words for my dad to hear
From a young age, I have been taught by my mom what it means to be a moral, compassionate, and tolerant person in today’s society. In addition, I am a very religious person and am in complete agreement with the Buddhist views of not harming other sentient beings, having a calm mind to access all situations, and not “judging of a book by it’s cover”. But that doesn’t mean I’ve been able to live my life completely by those standards. A very touchy and personal topic I’ve never really been able to face head-on about is my appearance. Not only now, but ever since I was young, once topics such as beauty, health, and weight appeared, I would be the first one to shy away from the conversation. I remember specifically when I had an argument with my dad and my feelings at that time were shattered, if they could be shattered any more than they already were. I remember the roaring that sounded something like, “You waste your mom’s money on a gym membership that you don’t use! I go to the gym everyday, why are you so lazy?” or “Who likes fat girls? If you ask me, I don’t!” Words hurt a lot more than actions, especially words that come from people who are immediate family. The standards in which I have chosen to live by are constantly challenged when issues like such arise. Keeping calm becomes the last priority and what even is tolerance? It’s almost like all the willpower I have is just thrown out the window without a second thought and immediately, retaliation becomes a natural reflex. Of course, in time, I only grew resentful and uncaring towards such words. Let’s just conclude I didn’t exactly return any nice words for my dad to hear