The last six months of my life have been life changing. Coming back from an internship in Washington D.C. I took a job working at as a mentor for a residential treatment center. This treatment center works with specifically with teenagers with drug addictions and behavioral issues. As I was interviewed, the interviewer explained one of our primary goals, as a treatment center, is to help the boys develop better relationships. According to my interviewer, these improved relationships were the means by which the boys were to kick their addictions. This was a complete paradigm shift for me—I was being told that bettering relationships was the remedy for drug addiction.
Up to that point in my life, all the second-hand stories of drug addicts I had heard followed a traditional storyline. Justin got curious one day and decided to the shady character at school. One thing led to another, and Justin was a full-fledged criminal (stealing things or money from friends or family members or out of cars, shoplifting) in order to feed his habit, he was expelled from school (in fact, several schools) ostracized from his family and any real friends, and he eventually is locked up for possession or dealing charges. Or there was the other story. Justin got in with the crowd at school, and eventually the same line of effects as the first story. While many of the aforementioned effects are common, society tends to only superficially explore cause to drug addiction. In fact, society tends to look at deteriorated relationships as more of an effect of drug addiction rather than a cause of drug addiction. Since beginning my time as a mentor I have been able to get to know the stories of many of these boys. There are several common threads among their stories, but I would like to focus on one commonality that is most unique—deteriorating relationships. In order to properly explain the causes of drug addiction, refer back to Justin’s story. Those stories are society’s version of Justin’s story. They are not Justin’s story. Justin’s story begins well before secondary school. It begins in elementary school, when he was bullied. He told his parents about his being bullied, but his parents didn’t push the issue to far with his teachers Not only that, but at home his parents were struggling with own their relationship. Justin came home everyday to another argument between his parents. Eventually, Justin took this hostility to school, and gradually became the bully. He invalidated those few friends he had; he put down those who were smaller than he was. He couldn’t confide in his parents anymore. They were having problems of their own, and besides they weren’t all too effective at helping him solve his problems the last time he went to them. He entirely isolated himself, whether it was through playing video games by himself, or just being alone. In another version of Justin’s story Justin never really shared who he really was with his friends or family. He did what those in therapy call stuffing, or he bottled everything up, and hid his real thoughts and emotions. He hid his thoughts and emotions, out of fear of being looked down upon. He wanted to be liked. He act however he needed to in order to be liked—that included with his own family. Justin was incredibly insecure! Seemingly he was the popular guy. The guy everyone wanted to be like. However, in reality, no one actually knew Justin. Justin kept his most vulnerable side to himself. He never let anyone know how much how angry he was at his mom for dying or how crushed he was when his dad would call home telling he would be …show more content…
I come to realize that many addicts’ stories possess many of the same themes, while still maintaining their own originality. Through my experiences, I have a firm belief that the quality of one’s relationships and connections with others plays a large role in one’s susceptibility to an addiction whether that be drugs, pornography, or some other act. I have discovered that those in government who are hard on crime (particularly drug-related crime) are clueless, when it comes to understanding how to fight the war on drugs, and that our justice system is only breeding more addicts and harder
Up to that point in my life, all the second-hand stories of drug addicts I had heard followed a traditional storyline. Justin got curious one day and decided to the shady character at school. One thing led to another, and Justin was a full-fledged criminal (stealing things or money from friends or family members or out of cars, shoplifting) in order to feed his habit, he was expelled from school (in fact, several schools) ostracized from his family and any real friends, and he eventually is locked up for possession or dealing charges. Or there was the other story. Justin got in with the crowd at school, and eventually the same line of effects as the first story. While many of the aforementioned effects are common, society tends to only superficially explore cause to drug addiction. In fact, society tends to look at deteriorated relationships as more of an effect of drug addiction rather than a cause of drug addiction. Since beginning my time as a mentor I have been able to get to know the stories of many of these boys. There are several common threads among their stories, but I would like to focus on one commonality that is most unique—deteriorating relationships. In order to properly explain the causes of drug addiction, refer back to Justin’s story. Those stories are society’s version of Justin’s story. They are not Justin’s story. Justin’s story begins well before secondary school. It begins in elementary school, when he was bullied. He told his parents about his being bullied, but his parents didn’t push the issue to far with his teachers Not only that, but at home his parents were struggling with own their relationship. Justin came home everyday to another argument between his parents. Eventually, Justin took this hostility to school, and gradually became the bully. He invalidated those few friends he had; he put down those who were smaller than he was. He couldn’t confide in his parents anymore. They were having problems of their own, and besides they weren’t all too effective at helping him solve his problems the last time he went to them. He entirely isolated himself, whether it was through playing video games by himself, or just being alone. In another version of Justin’s story Justin never really shared who he really was with his friends or family. He did what those in therapy call stuffing, or he bottled everything up, and hid his real thoughts and emotions. He hid his thoughts and emotions, out of fear of being looked down upon. He wanted to be liked. He act however he needed to in order to be liked—that included with his own family. Justin was incredibly insecure! Seemingly he was the popular guy. The guy everyone wanted to be like. However, in reality, no one actually knew Justin. Justin kept his most vulnerable side to himself. He never let anyone know how much how angry he was at his mom for dying or how crushed he was when his dad would call home telling he would be …show more content…
I come to realize that many addicts’ stories possess many of the same themes, while still maintaining their own originality. Through my experiences, I have a firm belief that the quality of one’s relationships and connections with others plays a large role in one’s susceptibility to an addiction whether that be drugs, pornography, or some other act. I have discovered that those in government who are hard on crime (particularly drug-related crime) are clueless, when it comes to understanding how to fight the war on drugs, and that our justice system is only breeding more addicts and harder