Theory Of Cohabitation Before Marriage

It is an interesting topic, a topic that media seems to be so interested in. In 2011, the most controversial topic that year was the 72-day-marriage of Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries. This alarming news made divorce seem like such a common, simple issue to be dealt with in no time. Divorce seems to be increasing each year, especially since this issue has become less taboo in more recent years. With the amount of divorces occurring each year, it is impossible not to wonder what causes them. “One in every two marriages end in divorce.” Does this broad, unclear statistic carry any truth at all? Is there really a universal truth about divorce? Oftentimes, this statistic is seen as a “universal truth” in regards to marriage and divorce. As a …show more content…
The theory behind cohabitation is to essentially practice married life, while giving the relationship the ultimate compatibility test. Though it may seem like a great idea, mainly because cohabiting couples tend to learn more about each other compared to couples that do not opt to cohabit before marriage, many of these cohabiting couples never make it to marriage. The reason that cohabitation does not help decrease the divorce rate is that initially, cohabitation is seen as less of a commitment compared to marriage. In the case of infidelity or falling out of love, it is easy to exit a common-law relationship (Kulu and Boyle 881). Ambert’s summary of Homann-Marriott’s 2006 paper states that “couples who cohabit have somewhat less positive problem solving behaviors and are less supportive of each other on average than those who have not cohabited before marriage” (Ambert 15). Because the difference between a common-law relationship to marriage, in this case, is very minimal, there seems as though there is no further effort made in marriage; duties remain the same as the duties prior to marriage. The responsibilities cohabiting couples have and the experiences they have are usually similar to those that married couples have. For many cohabiting couples, there is no real lifelong commitment made to each other, and thus, sometimes unknowingly, this mentality gets transferred into marriage. In other words, the relationship after marriage is viewed exactly the same way as the relationship before marriage was viewed. The stigma of ending a marriage, of getting a divorce is no longer present (Ambert 13). Consequently, divorce is often the answer to unhappiness in marriage. Ambert believes that “Canadians and most Westerners have developed a lower threshold of tolerance when their marriage does not meet with their expectations for personal fulfillment” (14).