My parents were never really religious. They instead fit nicely into the group of people who like to refer to themselves as “Cultural Catholics”, those who don’t really care for the the God aspect of the faith and instead only follow through with the traditions. As a result, I got Baptized And had a First Communion but never really went to Mass and therefore had a weak foundation from the beginning.
Around the time that I was nine years old, my mom called me into family room and told me that my Dad and she were not going to be together anymore. As a nine year old who had lived a fairly normal life prior, I could not comprehend this well. I was consumed by the thought that this was just a temporary issue. Obviously, I was wrong.
I am …show more content…
Everything had to happen twice: Birthdays, Thanksgiving, Christmas, etc. They said it was because it wasn’t fair for them. This resulted in me having having no real stability. I ended up as 3 different people: MrCarroca who appears in public, MrCarroca who lives at his father’s house and MrCarroca who lives at his mother …show more content…
I didn’t hate her but I wanted to put as much distance between myself and her as possible. Instead, I was forced into conversations and and other siblingly things because my Dad considers her a part of the family.
The combination of my Dad being against me and having to fake my life brought me into depression. Depression is an extremely mysterious illness. Those who suffer from it can have extreme success in making their emotions and it can often onsy manifest when it is too late. In my experience hurting myself was effective at driving away the pain. As soon as I realized that a lack of sleep would end up suppressing my memories of my issues, I sprung up at the opportunity. Some nights I got as little as two hours of sleep. A good day was four (I am a teen by the way).
Then, something odd started to happen, I started to go to Mass on my own. Originally it was simply a period of time that I was able to escape my home and recompose my thoughts. Later however, I started to truly enjoy going although I was still not sure about where I laid
Around the time that I was nine years old, my mom called me into family room and told me that my Dad and she were not going to be together anymore. As a nine year old who had lived a fairly normal life prior, I could not comprehend this well. I was consumed by the thought that this was just a temporary issue. Obviously, I was wrong.
I am …show more content…
Everything had to happen twice: Birthdays, Thanksgiving, Christmas, etc. They said it was because it wasn’t fair for them. This resulted in me having having no real stability. I ended up as 3 different people: MrCarroca who appears in public, MrCarroca who lives at his father’s house and MrCarroca who lives at his mother …show more content…
I didn’t hate her but I wanted to put as much distance between myself and her as possible. Instead, I was forced into conversations and and other siblingly things because my Dad considers her a part of the family.
The combination of my Dad being against me and having to fake my life brought me into depression. Depression is an extremely mysterious illness. Those who suffer from it can have extreme success in making their emotions and it can often onsy manifest when it is too late. In my experience hurting myself was effective at driving away the pain. As soon as I realized that a lack of sleep would end up suppressing my memories of my issues, I sprung up at the opportunity. Some nights I got as little as two hours of sleep. A good day was four (I am a teen by the way).
Then, something odd started to happen, I started to go to Mass on my own. Originally it was simply a period of time that I was able to escape my home and recompose my thoughts. Later however, I started to truly enjoy going although I was still not sure about where I laid