They were financially doing better than I had ever seen them do in the past, and it was only my life that seemed to be going backwards. We had to sell our home and buy one that was half the price of the last, and we simply couldn 't get a break EVER it seemed. I was literally the Volunteer of the Year with very charity, and even when we had no money, we still gave everything we didn 't have to help others. I started to think I was just a sucker or a complete fool to help so many people over the years, because now they were all doing great, and my family was barely able to pay our bills. I was at a point where I NEEDED to find God more than ever, because I had finally realized that I just couldn 't do it anymore.
I finally broke down and opened up this book that belonged to my grandmother. It was called the Holy Bible, and inside of the pages I could barely keep my eyes open to read what seemed like gibberish at first, but I skipped past all of it and went to chapters that I could pronounce. Matthew was the first, and then I read Mark, Luke, John, Acts, Romans, Corinthians...and so on until I had a complete understanding of what was going on in the Old Testament that led up to those books in the bible, and then it was easy and actually interesting and incredibly