The Example Of Miscommunication

2045 Words 9 Pages
Part A: Describing the miscommunication
An example when a miscommunication has happened in my personal life was with my father whom I have major problems with and no relationship with. I was trying to express my feelings on how he treats myself and my mum and how that was affecting our everyday lives. My mother and I were sitting on our couch at my mum's house and he was sitting on a chair opposite us. As I was trying to tell him how I was feeling, he was not looking at me at all and he was staring out the window. As I was trying to talk to him, he was standing up and practicing golf swings (with an imaginary club). He did not make any eye contact unless my mum told him blatantly to pay attention to me and it was incredibly frustrating. He
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DeVito (2015) explains that "Active listening is a process of sending back to the speaker what you as a listener think the speaker meant – both in content and in feelings" (p.93). Speakers desire people who actively listen to them, in the forms of both verbal and non-verbal engagement (Hargie, 2016). There are two techniques that can be used to become a more active listener: asking questions and being empathic. (Soloman & Theiss, 2012). One of the biggest issues with my miscommunication with my father was that he was not asking me questions about how I was feeling or to show that he was paying attention. If my father had asked me questions about what I was saying, even if he was questioning the validity of what I was saying, it would have shown me that he was paying attention and that he was trying to understand how my thought process was working. However, because he didn't ask me any questions, it showed me that he was not paying any attention to what I was expressing to him. For my communication to be successful between my father and I, he needed to ask questions along the lines of "Is this really how you feel?" or "How did that affect you?" Another way that my father could have been an active listener would be to convey attitudes of empathy to myself (Solomon & Theiss, 2012). If my father used empathy while listening to myself expressing my feelings, our miscommunication could have worked out in a much more positive and effective way. Empathy helps to increases people's involvement in a conversation and it helps someone to engage in active listening (Solomon & Theiss, 2012). For my father to have been a good active listener, he should have used paraphrasing my words and their meanings and expressed his understanding of what I was talking about. My father should have been repeating in his own words what I was telling him. If he had done this, it would have

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