The minute I found myself thinking, what is the point of life? I knew I was poisoned. When a human being feels as if they have no purpose in their life, it messes with their mind and sadly; I am not the only victim of this devastating emotion. In The Bean Trees by Barbara Kingsolver, Lou Ann’s husband Angel leaves her and she ends up raising her son, Dwayne Ray, by herself. The loss of her husband and her fear that she will raise her son wrong has led her to believe she is a failure in all aspects of her life. However, after finding a job at Red Hot Mama’s salsa factory, she regains a new surge of motivation and purpose to live. Lou Ann’s job allows her to fight her way back from her place of darkness, which greatly relates to my journey in
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One of the rare exceptions to this unfortunate predisposition was I. As a child, there was always something in the world that gave me purpose and if there was not, I gave myself purpose. Nonetheless, society’s influences started to affect me as I grew and my strength wavered. I started basing my happiness on my relationships with others and my social standpoint rather than my personal accomplishments, whether it was gaining knowledge in my classes or doing well in violin. Unexpectedly, a relationship ended in the summer of 2015 and for some reason, it hit me extremely hard. I felt a lot of things at once, but most of all I felt like a failure. It was as if that relationship was the sole purpose of my life and if it failed, that meant I had failed as a person. When I was reading The Bean Trees, I noticed that Lou Ann’s mentality in her relationship is almost the exact same as mine. Her purpose is to maintain a family with her husband and child but when she loses Angel, she no longer has a purpose. When Lou Ann and Taylor are at the zoo, Lou Ann says about Angel, “I just can’t get over him leaving like that” (134). Lou Ann does not want Angel back because she is …show more content…
Having a job she genuinely enjoys gives her a new outlet for her intelligence and emotions and makes her actually feel successful. When one loves what he or she is doing, they will do it well and when they do it well, they will receive positive affirmation. Lou Ann’s job allows her to enter this new cycle of life that revives her spirit and replaces her feelings of failure with a new way to contribute to the world. I did not realize at first, but school was improving my life one day at a time just like Lou Ann’s job. My mind was being utilized and I was immersing myself in my studies. Slowly, I started focusing less on how much of a failure I was and more on how I can improve myself. School stopped being about just grades and became my new purpose in life. I wanted to learn about what enzymes do in our bodies and I wanted to watch both of the The Great Gatsby movies. Studying the material I learned was no longer a chore because it was not boring to me. It was almost like this was a new relationship I could put all my love into but with this relationship, I could only get positive affirmation as long as I worked hard at it. Not only did I regain my sense of purpose in life but I also started enjoying school for the first
One of the rare exceptions to this unfortunate predisposition was I. As a child, there was always something in the world that gave me purpose and if there was not, I gave myself purpose. Nonetheless, society’s influences started to affect me as I grew and my strength wavered. I started basing my happiness on my relationships with others and my social standpoint rather than my personal accomplishments, whether it was gaining knowledge in my classes or doing well in violin. Unexpectedly, a relationship ended in the summer of 2015 and for some reason, it hit me extremely hard. I felt a lot of things at once, but most of all I felt like a failure. It was as if that relationship was the sole purpose of my life and if it failed, that meant I had failed as a person. When I was reading The Bean Trees, I noticed that Lou Ann’s mentality in her relationship is almost the exact same as mine. Her purpose is to maintain a family with her husband and child but when she loses Angel, she no longer has a purpose. When Lou Ann and Taylor are at the zoo, Lou Ann says about Angel, “I just can’t get over him leaving like that” (134). Lou Ann does not want Angel back because she is …show more content…
Having a job she genuinely enjoys gives her a new outlet for her intelligence and emotions and makes her actually feel successful. When one loves what he or she is doing, they will do it well and when they do it well, they will receive positive affirmation. Lou Ann’s job allows her to enter this new cycle of life that revives her spirit and replaces her feelings of failure with a new way to contribute to the world. I did not realize at first, but school was improving my life one day at a time just like Lou Ann’s job. My mind was being utilized and I was immersing myself in my studies. Slowly, I started focusing less on how much of a failure I was and more on how I can improve myself. School stopped being about just grades and became my new purpose in life. I wanted to learn about what enzymes do in our bodies and I wanted to watch both of the The Great Gatsby movies. Studying the material I learned was no longer a chore because it was not boring to me. It was almost like this was a new relationship I could put all my love into but with this relationship, I could only get positive affirmation as long as I worked hard at it. Not only did I regain my sense of purpose in life but I also started enjoying school for the first