In the article “Sex, Lies and Conversation: Why Is It So Hard for Men and Women to Talk to Each Other?” By Deborah Tannen, the author addresses the different ways in which men and women communicate with each other, and how most times a lack of understanding these differences leads to a breakdown in communication. Deborah Tannen earned a PhD in linguistics at the University of California, Berkeley, in 1979 and is currently a professor of linguistics at Georgetown University. She has published more than a hundred articles, and has written more than twenty books. With her impressive list of credentials, she most certainly has put the time and research needed into this subject, and she offers valuable insight on the different ways in which men
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“For women…intimacy is the fabric of relationships, and talk is the thread from which it is woven” (Tannen 382). She describes what is important is not necessarily the individual subjects that are being discussed, but it’s more of a need to feel close to their husbands. “Since they don’t assume talk is the cement that binds a relationship, men don’t know what kind of talk women want, and they don’t miss it when it isn’t there” (382). Body language can often be misunderstood when related to communication. “I found at every age, the girls and women faced each other directly, their eyes anchored on each other’s faces” (Tannen 383). Yet, she went on to discuss how men in groups sit next to each other, not face to face while talking. She goes on to describe a situation where a “young woman in college was frustrated: Whenever she told her boyfriend she wanted to talk to him, he would lie down on the floor, close his eyes, and put his arm over his face” (383). This of course signaled to her that he was taking a nap and not listening to her. “But he insisted he was listening extra hard” (383). “Laying down covering his eyes helped him concentrate on what she was saying” (Tannen 383). It is very apparent how this situation can be misunderstood. Essentially, if they can understand the differences in how each other communicates then they can adapt and there will no longer be a …show more content…
“The communication problems that endanger marriage can’t be fixed by mechanical engineering. They require a new conceptual frame-work about the role of talk in human relationships” (Tannen 385). Tannen clearly presents these communication problem as a cross-cultural problem rather than just placing the blame on one group or the
“For women…intimacy is the fabric of relationships, and talk is the thread from which it is woven” (Tannen 382). She describes what is important is not necessarily the individual subjects that are being discussed, but it’s more of a need to feel close to their husbands. “Since they don’t assume talk is the cement that binds a relationship, men don’t know what kind of talk women want, and they don’t miss it when it isn’t there” (382). Body language can often be misunderstood when related to communication. “I found at every age, the girls and women faced each other directly, their eyes anchored on each other’s faces” (Tannen 383). Yet, she went on to discuss how men in groups sit next to each other, not face to face while talking. She goes on to describe a situation where a “young woman in college was frustrated: Whenever she told her boyfriend she wanted to talk to him, he would lie down on the floor, close his eyes, and put his arm over his face” (383). This of course signaled to her that he was taking a nap and not listening to her. “But he insisted he was listening extra hard” (383). “Laying down covering his eyes helped him concentrate on what she was saying” (Tannen 383). It is very apparent how this situation can be misunderstood. Essentially, if they can understand the differences in how each other communicates then they can adapt and there will no longer be a …show more content…
“The communication problems that endanger marriage can’t be fixed by mechanical engineering. They require a new conceptual frame-work about the role of talk in human relationships” (Tannen 385). Tannen clearly presents these communication problem as a cross-cultural problem rather than just placing the blame on one group or the